Raggin' Piano Boogie

HIS SPIRIT LIVES ON! ... BONER, THE PIANO DOG ... November 27, 1994 ... February 20, 2010

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July 31, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

Mo's aging along with the inevitable necessity to let him pass on weighs on me in every moment no matter how much I work on acceptance and living in the moment with him. That along with everything else I've been writing about... this life has been difficult! Online activity has dramatically dropped. Facebook is really the only place I've been and just to post and/or make a few comments to people who have responded to a post. I no longer go through any timeline outside of my page. Also, I have been avoiding comments in general on pages about societal issues or just bad business. I want to be done with all that. I did what I did when I could do it. Now... it just feeds my rage in general. Lets get back to Musical Fun, Friendship and Respect... Empowerment and Inspiration. I still say that first thing when I wake up from whatever bad dream I am having. We have it really good compared to those over in say the Ukraine. People who we're living life just as I am now and it all went into a living hell they now have to deal with. As a Ukrainian myself, I'd still go over there in a heart beat with the Traveling Piano if the opportunity ever arose.

July 30, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

I was thinking, maybe once I can get the piano working again after the heat dissipates I'll go to a disaster somewhere to create music because that is just one of the things I do. Then the thought and feeling goes to naa... did that done that. Ok, what about sharing with the homeless... thought goes to naa... burnt out of that. Then onto the streets and working to get a better truck or refurbish this one. Zero interest. Once I get going again in any way will it be like, ok, this is what I enjoy, want to be doing? The history of this journey says I never, ever want to do it but when I do all the joy sticks click right into place. Through times like this I played some music indoors in my room. There is no energy or desire to go through the hassle of setting up the stand, piano and seat and plugging everything in to play for a short while and then take it all down. I've been backing up files and organizing... that I can always do and kind of enjoy.

July 29, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

As it was through the time of covid, meditation feeds my need to feel secure, enables me to love, keeps me in touch with my true desires in life and to know I am safe. For about forty minutes a day I sing the Gayatri Mantra which is nothing more than a Gratitude mantra saying over and over... God/Universe remover of all suffering, creator of all joy, direct out thoughts. I sing it for all of us with Ohm's... in-between about three or four times. I listen to a recording of Deva Premel's and her partner Miten's singing of it. My mind wonders all the time usually its about food and what I am going to eat, then people in general, sometimes memories but when I can I get back to listening to myself say the words or thinking about my appreciation for not being in control of... everything! For a good fifteen minutes I do it while giving Mo a massage and he really loves that. He is totally in touch with the spiritual love and gratitude the universe provides through both of us. If I read something like this in a blog thirty years ago it would have freaked me out. Lol, I would run away from it fast, be almost grossed out by it, lol.

July 28, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

Yep, times are difficult for me. It feels like the journey is over. Always I must remind myself that feelings are not fact. The passion does not exist hell, I do not even have any interest. I've stopped doing just about everything and everything has just about stopped. My brain wants me to be angry... all the time. The heat keeping me out of commission with the homeless outreach and music along with my physical limitations with age and being out of shape and my brain... that brain can be and is often a cloudy fog. What is happening in the world politically and especially here at home oh my God, frustration and anger wants to dominate. But I am on top of all this. At least I know what is happening with me. The question is... do I want, can I find a way out into something new or get back on track with what has been.

July 27, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

Traveling Piano Pup Mo is growing older faster and faster these days. He can no longer jump into the truck or on the bed in our room. He must be super careful when going up and down stairs. The use it or lose it fact is happening. We cannot be active outside with the heat right now and also do not have the funds to go anywhere else. His mind is going, senility has set in. The lights outside the window at night from the Las Vegas strip scare him. Even with the blinds closed he is imagining whatever outside that is scaring him. He just prefers to lay on the floor in the bathroom where he feels safer. Today I opened the door after he had his breakfast as I always do. He goes out for about ten seconds to check everything out and comes back in.

Today, he ran down stairs to the spot where he pee's before going to bed every night. It was like he thought day was night concerning his routine. It was a first. His hearing and eyesight is fading as well. He now needs a leash most of the time. I am saying this because it is the reality. I am working to accept it as the flow of life here on earth. And, I want people to know what is happening in real time verses one day... surprise Mo is gone! I work on gratitude, saying aware of a power greater than simply here on earth that is friendly, loving, good, inclusive and right. And I work to keep my thoughts directed into the truth of spirit. It is all good but, although extremely difficult to deal with. When he passes on, God help me. This I know and am working to be prepared to go on living... for you. That. wether you care, believe it, want it or not!

July 26, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

I have decided. A super ween off of Facebook for good has happened. No longer will I go to the home timeline. It has been dropped like I dropped Twitter totally. I will post on my on timeline and visit friends who post on my timeline, that is it. And when I find crap not compatible for friendship on the timelines of friends I visit, out they go. All people can follow the Traveling Piano page. My Danny Kean page is a personal page for friends that I want to have. It is not for everyone. There is zero desire to share my love with those who use it to share their shit be it a gaslit brain, the gaslit brain of others, those who answer to authoritarian propaganda, are racist, exclusionary, etc... you get the drift. It brings to mind my family who used to say they loved me while supporting everything and anything socially about me that would go against my life and destroy me. Doesn't work. Onward...

July 25, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

Prioritization of what is personally most important for me as I live through this life is crucial now. I am done trying to set myself as an example socially in the world. That has always been part of my agenda, somewhat of being an activist in calling out right from wrong and especially what is misleading and insidious. The start intent of this journey was to show and be myself. That shifts and changes over time but the core will always remain the same. The desire to love, nurture and to be loved and nurtured in return. Now I must just live more totally for myself. There is a need to protect myself in knowing what is real or not via the internet. I do not want to spend my time trying to discern reality from falsehood, etc... and more importantly in knowing I have a vulnerable mind, I do not want to get sucked into false spirit. So moving away from it all piece meal is the way to go. I've learned enough and feel I know how human nature works. All the news, all the generations are cyclical in the same ways as in everything old is new again with different coatings. Are you a giver for all or a taker for yourself only or for an authoritarian over your life.

July 24, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

This slideshow of music I made many years back is over seven minutes long. One would say it is too long but then again others would say... more. I remember when I painted my house back in the day. It was unconventionally bright blue with yellow trim. Some people would drive by and complain, one guy even yelled, fuck you! Yet, others would drive by and yell, I love it. I learned something about that. Just who am I out to please? Me. And of course those who like what I have to offer. It was Dr. Seuss who said... “Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.” These photos are all of guys I met with the Traveling Piano.

July 23, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

Here is a minute or so of music from while in Alaska some years back. I am missing the music right now and the energy for it but, have complete confidence that I am just in a lull with the heat and all.

July 22, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

I'm ready to get rid of my high cholesterol having recently purchased 5lbs of steel cut oats! Oats cooked with water, milk, cinnamon clover honey, chunks of prunes, walnuts and dried, cut pieces of sugar coated kiwi (yum). Everyday, something different... tomorrow I'll try peanut butter and butterscotch nuggets. Several times a month people contact me about a past Traveling Piano connection. It happens from those recent to those of over thirty years ago. Wow, working full time from the back of the same pickup truck for over thirty years!!! Some people even celebrate the anniversary of their experience! Can you believe that? What an honor, a reason for gratitude, a reminder of the works benefit for so many others. Although everyday is a wonder and includes thoughts of how much longer it will continue.

July 21, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

Tonight I almost had a heat stroke! Literally, I now know what experts say when they warn that you do not feel it coming on and that is why to be extra careful. The sun had gone down but it was still 115º out. I went to the truck to bring stuff that was in the back up to my second floor room three times and spent about five minutes checking out the cab. It was all less than fifteen minutes total. I did not feel hot but I felt dizzy, my mind was blank, I felt nauseous while thinking there was nothing I ate that could have been bad. Then there was a constant chest strain. I knew what was happening and have an herbal tincture literally called "chill." It helped but wow, knowing how vulnerable I am with my health these days is just mind boggling. I'm drinking about a gallon of water a day too!

July 20, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

Mo and I drove to our friends Mary and Eric's today to sort out some belongings I have stored in their garage. When I turned off the truck at their house the Traveling Piano engine jolted like crazy and would almost not turn off. When I got home the same thing but worse. I could have taken the key out with the truck still running. The over heat needle is at the top all the time when driving, it is pretty scary. The truck is just to old to run in a hundred twenty degree heat especially with stop and starts at red lights and also with the speed of highway travel. There will be almost two more months of this heat, do we need to get out of here? Mo gets a short walk in everyday at about 3am in the morning when the temperature can get down to 97º. Other than that, the poor guy is bored shitless and the lack of movement with his age well... the use it or lose it saying enters here.

July 19, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

While taking Mo out for a walk down the street in the middle of the morning a guy walking in the opposite direction and as he begins to pass us, stops to say "piano man, its really good to see you" and gives a fist bump. He knew me from the Las Vegas Rescue mission back about four years ago. He said, "Can I ask you a question?" And then said, "Am I all right?" I replied, of course, your talking with me, here we are together on the street, your doing fine. Wow, my heart goes out to so many people lost, suffering, alone on the streets and especially in this heat, those living in the dirt with nothing more than a tarp for shade in the sun with 120º heat during the day. I wish I could have spent more time with the guy but I needed to take care of myself and Mo first and just get back to our room before the heat got to us. Knowing I have such a positive affect on people, have made such a lasting impression just makes me want to cry with love. Of course there are those on the other end of the spectrum too in all ways. Oh well... lol.

July 18, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

My writings and thoughts I realize are too many words and blah, blah for many people, over the head for many, just mindless words, confusing, frustrating, there are those who do not want to go as deep in thought as I do in life as in, I think too much... I try to be considerate when I write to a point. The point is not for them, lol. Those kind of people do not want any point. They just want what they want. And, I want what I want and... I can have that on my turf, thank God I have my own turf for whatever it is worth.

July 17, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

I am really fighting for my sanity but need to remember nothing is different that it ever was. My entire life has been a challenge for the sake of sanity. In getting older the trick is to simplify. It is a challenge to adjust in new ways for new reasons always but the core issue is "adjustment." Life is full of adjustment if you live it fully aware. Fulfillment comes through adjustment. Purpose becomes a realized through adjustment. Enlightenment is adjustment.

July 16, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

For me, there is no greater pleasure, fulfillment and joy than making a positive impact on someone's life no matter how big or small. But of course the bigger, the better. Outside it was over a hundred twenty degrees today! The truck would not work in this heat and neither would Mo. But, those living out on the streets are on my mind constantly and now is the time more than any other that they need support. I was too afraid to go it alone just in case the heat got to me. If I fainted I would be pretty much on my own. So, my friend Todd stepped in to help. We used his truck, Mo stayed home and we took to the streets with 20 gallons of water, 120 lbs of ice and huge 32oz styrofoam cups. The appreciation was overflowing. Of course anything would have been appreciated but the size and amount of cups overflowing with ice and water was just perfect.

What was shared will have a lasting impact with the fact that people cares for others. We ran across several other vehicles handing out juice and food also. I came back and sort of passed out numb for a few hours. The fact that I drank a gallon and a half of water while doing it all saved my ass. Also, that I took a meal from someone handing them out and ate. Mistake learned, eat more before going out in heat like this. While feeling total gratitude I realized that today is my 41st anniversary of being clean and sober. Just... wow! The day could not have been better spent. When I was sick in the disease of alcohol and drug addiction and even when younger before, people would say, "if only you could channel that energy and passion you have in you." Well, that happened by asking for help to do it through the years. And also, by seeking and looking until I found the kind of help I needed for me. As a result, I do not own any of the "wonderful" that I am, lol. It is all but for the Grace of God, through others. This is... fact. If anything, everything is all a "We."

July 15, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

When I wake up the bed gets brushed from Mo hair, I get my coffee brewing and feed Mo. Then I sit down to try and resist not reading the news which never works. Then I get angry about something I see in an article and jump onto Facebook to comment with my opinion, attack, attitude, calling out, very rarely a compliment and then I try not to get sucked into wasting time on the facebook timeline where I will almost certainly continue down that same path. God, please help me to move away from all that shit! Lol, moving on to processing Traveling Piano photos help, doing some mediation with Mo helps, sorting and filing data helps, cooking, some room cleaning (rare) calling a friend, watching a television show or movie or doing something I've been putting off like updating this blog... for many years there was no need to update this blog. It happened every night before I went to bed. Just like going outside every day with the Traveling Piano or indoors for the dinners at the local rescue mission or doing homeless outreach with resources for people. It is too hot for anything outside and the lack of my creating music as a result is really suffering more than anything else. The rescue mission piano is most likely dead by now from lack of upkeep and with that place... did that, done that.

July 14, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

The world is in a heat frenzy right now. Of course it is hot and it is too hot, and climate warming is a real thing but it is not everything. Every year it goes above 120º where I live downtown here in Las Vegas. In the last few years it has been over a hundred degrees every day for months. Nothing is helped by fixating on it with the news. Everything in the world is falling apart in many ways not just through climate change. The answer for me is just to read less and less news. It is up to me. I am always working on that disconnect and it is not easy. Feeling connected to the world and what is happening and being socially responsible is important to me. The more one reads and thinks about the heat, the more it all manifests in reality. I plan to hibernate in my room for the next few days with Mo. At night if it goes below a hundred we will take a short walk. I have a keyboard to create music with and a lot of Traveling Piano work to process and post online.

July 13, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

For the last few days Mo and I have been spending time at our friends Mary and Eric's house. I have some possessions stored there and I have been going through it all to catalogue exactly what I have. For example my absolutely essential room humidifier died last night. I go to my list of catalogued stuff to find I have a spare in a brown box on the second level of shelves in the back, in their garage. That is how I need to work with everything while living in such a small space. Most everything in my past is gone. I remember when I lost ninety five percent of my career archives in a computer crash about twenty years ago. Well, today in the few packings I have left, I found my original birth certificate, the Traveling Piano's truck title (it is 36 years old now) and original promo pieces I thought were gone forever. Also, I found few newspaper clippings, personal creative writing and and photos and my copy-write statement for the Raggin' Piano Boogie name and concept. That cost $2000 and took two years to get once upon a time ago. Anyway, physical evidence of my career on the truck still exists even if only a few pieces, whoo-hoo!!!

July 12, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

I dropped off the Traveling Piano keyboard a spare keyboard for repair today. Getting it out of the truck was difficult because the piano was so hot you could fry an egg on it. The heat may have destroyed it, I'll find out. Several keys are not playing and there is just no joy trying to create music on a shitty piano. I've already negotiated so much in using a keyboard verses an acoustic piano, the sound, etc... In the past years I would put a sun tarp over the entire truck every night and take it off every day to use it. Those days are past. The inertia and/or physical ability no longer exists. As a result, the truck just sits in the desert sun and fries in the heat. The truck body is showing the results of direct sun and heat everyday and all day long, for sure! I've met the repair guy before, he knows what I do and respects my work so I feel a little safe he will not screw me over but then again that says nothing about his abilities or what he thinks is a fair price for the job. In any case my being able to pay for a repair and having made the move to get the repair done after procrastinating for over a half year, there is some relief to be felt. It feels the same now as when I take the truck in for repair. Yet another hospital operation, how many times can I do this.

July 11, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

Ahh, for the love of finding ways to stay interested in life. Actually, it is more like remembering why I am interested in life. There are many, many reasons but they often get distracted with negativity that I allow to seep into the fabric of my being. Sometimes I look for negativity as a distraction. Staying interested in the Traveling Piano after all these years, it is a self-motivating job out of choice. I've said it several times in the past that all relationships are like that in life. When young, motivation was much easier along with the energy in having it. I had the energy, motivation or not. The motivation was all about the musical exploration of fun, friendship and respect which mixed with inspiration and empowerment and then added purpose, compassion, empathy and healing. The love of nature played into it all with photography also. But after all is said and done there is one thing I had set out to do that has not been accomplished. That is to connect with a larger entity, to partner with someone in order to take the Traveling Piano to a bigger level. That has happened but not with a partner as in production company, a business, etc...

July 10, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

It is so important not to let worries enter into my system. There are 22 people who contribute monthly for this journey and even though most are $5 or less it amounts to a couple hundred bucks. Without that contribution, i would not make it to pay my rent, the trucks gas and misc needs like insurance payments, equipment upkeep, etc... So, I don't know when it started in my brain but there now exists a little obligation/expectation to keep going or I will lose that support. As I become less able to work with the Traveling for whatever reasons those contributing will of course begin to drop off. And, it feels like I will not have it in me to replace the funds needed to simply survive. I tell myself the end of everything is near anyway, why even think about it, don't waste your worries. The fact is, now I have enough and that feels mighty good from some of those past years! Today, all is good and ok. Mo is alive, I am alive to enjoy him, I have people that care, respect and appreciate me in my life... some even love me for me! And, I can pay my bills and have a room with air-conditioning.

July 09, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

Today with the beginning of my 69th year of life on this planet, I did not feel so good because I am so disappointed with how I have let my health deteriorate and have not had it in me to take care of myself as needed. But, the day improved as close friends and my niece called to wish me a happy birthday. Mo is doing good for his age. I decided to leave the comment option open on Facebook and then hundreds of people as usual, some from 50 yrs ago began to reach out to wish me a Happy Birthday. Of course fb prompts them to. Always, I feel I must respond to everyone personally. I figured, the gesture served as some insight on how many people are still on Facebook with my account after all these years and also, people need and are looking for a reason for human connection. I know this. But I also know that people really respect and appreciate me, my life and my work. That helps me to appreciate me, my life and work! Growing up I did not feel wanted by anyone except my mother. Then, through the middle years people just wanted what they could get from me. With the journey years now, I feel both wanted and appreciated and given to. It is a beautiful happening.

July 08, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

Mo is feeling better today after last night. Luckily, I have some pain/anti-inflammatory meds that I think have helped. I posted online, so many people care and have been sending comments of support. Good thing because my closet friends seem to be distancing themselves. I've had a doom and gloom complex going on and I think they may not be able to deal with any more of it as they are going through their own shit. I could make a lot of money from what happened. About five people asked if I need any for doctor bills. Of course, I said no. When it comes to the bottom line. I have me, Mo and God. When there is only me and God left well, that is all there really is to begin with. I can be real and feel good about that. I'm posting a slide show from my neighborhood a few years ago.

July 07, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

Traveling Piano Dog Mo was attacked tonight by a bulldog on Main Street here in Las Vegas. A guy with his girlfriend, I've seen them before, they pull a bunch of pups in a wagon while walking the mother and father to sell the pups. (I realized tonight) While they we're giving attention to a group of people swooning over the pups the male dog got away and ran to attack. Mo is 100% not aggressive and no match for any dog as he is heading towards fourteen years of age. We we're out for our nightly walk. Mo has six bites on his leg and with his age lets just hope for the best. A friend suggested I soak the wounds in rubbing alcohol. I did then applied liquid bandaid. Both Mo and I are traumatized. I want to cry. Whenever he gets hurt, it is unbelievable how much it emotionally affects me. I must step outside of myself for his sake. Its all just a reminder that we do not have much time left together.

July 06, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

I am thinking how we might need to get out of Downtown Las Vegas with the heat as bad as it is. The small space we are in does not allow for much of any activity. I need to create some music. Mo needs to interact with life. Fundraising just doesn't seem like the right thing to do, more so... I just do not want to do it anymore. Staying with someone will not work because I will be in there space while they think, why is he always here all the time and not out working with the truck? My ability to work as much as I have in the past is drastically less with my age both physically and mentally. Mo also and the truck as well. The piano system will no longer work in the heat. I'm hoping it is not destroyed. I'll need to ride up into the mountains some time soon where it is cooler to check out if the problem is in fact the heat. Whew... these days... well, as always... it is what it is.

July 05, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

Well, I am heading into number 68 with my birthday. It feels pretty unreal. As far as body weight which was a huge part of the journey from the start... I have failed miserably. It went so well for about ten years! Turning sixty eight, well this is just not a good month to do that all around for me, lol. As far as what would happen when I ran out of money (which happened several years ago)... well, the original goal of connecting with Oprah or someone to take the Traveling Piano to the next level has not been achieved and the other option to walk into the woods and disappear when the money ran out, that did not happen either. The journey took its own completely different path, a path I would never have dreamed of and I am completely satisfied with that and grateful. My life feels complete as a result. I found my soul and who I am as a person. Although, to continue on the path I have been on for all these years feels more difficult every day. I thought for sure I would be dead by now but... here I am!

July 04, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

To celebrate the 4th of July is to celebrate a society unlike any before. A government of the people and for the people through choice. The choice to choose right or wrong with the ability to grow through mistakes into the truth to spirit. We are each empowered through our vote. Our individual vote is most important on local levels much more than national. Small community government grows to dictate large government. This is how our democracy works. It is representative from the bottom up. True Americans live with a willingness to embrace all aspects of what it is to be a human being for better or worse.

Americans live side by side with capitalism, socialism and all other forms of thought for the purpose of Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness... for ALL. The USA has always stood for individuality through wholeness, as one. See that or learn to see it. This is in fact, the truth. Greed does exist in all of its forms here in America as does generosity. Where are you personally on this matter? American democracy was not created to be a finished product. It has always been meant to be as a work in progress. Our government is setup to be a "democracy" unique, and has been the most successful form of government in the world throughout the last 250 years. This, throughout all of its ups and downs. No other government allows the opportunity to both fail and succeed. That, is ultimate freedom. What makes America unique from all other forms of government is that it has been set up as an experiment with a set of ideals to work with in order to achieve full potential.

Celebrate and Respect American Democracy on July 4th... LOUDLY ...with its truth of purpose and goodness! Show your self-respect in gratitude as an American. Do not allow negativity to hijack and define who you are as an American. Do not allow what other people say define you as an American. Remember to remember... people throughout the world have immigrated to and continue to immigrate to the USA as a result of our sense of opportunity created through optimism. Our form of government here in the USA has always been for the world.

HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY!!!

July 03, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

Today was to be a hang out with my friends day with their pool and a barbecue. Not only is it too hot, I just need to straighten and clean my space. That is the best way to take care of myself first and foremost. Hanging outside would not happen anyway with the heat. Driving there would be dangerous with the truck in the heat. Remember, it is a very old truck now. I've been sleeping 10 to 12 hours a day but need to remember, I've been doing that on and off for years now. This is how much sleep I need. It has been this way for much of my life. Thank God I have the life setup to do that! When young I would always push myself physically too much, then end up sick or broken physically in some way. Now I have no choice but to watch myself carefully. Same with Mo. He needs to be watched carefully not to over extend himself. I lift him onto the bed most of the time now. His back leg is just not strong enough. I need to remember, this blog has never been about sending positive vibes out into the world. It has been about expressing myself both good and bad. I have avoided not writing the negative vibes about other specific people... and there has been some juicy material I've passed up on with that subject for sure, lol.

July 02, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

I intensely wanted to take out Gatorade and Ice to the streets today and would have left Mo home in our room alone for the first time. But, with it being 115º it was just not possible. There is no strength and with my age, I can feel my skin burning when in direct sun, wind or no wind. Not to mention the breathing issues. I would have to be getting in and out of the truck, stopping and starting, letting the truck engine sit and run idle... the last time I did that in heat like this, the head gasket broke. You can easily cook a hamburger on the trucks roof and/or inside on the dashboard. But... this is when help is needed most for those living on the streets! The realizations of my limitations now older is a practice in acceptance. And so silly I know, people will care less about me as I do less. It is just a fact of life but as I have learned throughout life, feelings are not always fact. I know that people care and will always care about me. That fact, when I can find the feeling for it is actually the truth in spirit.

July 01, 2023

Las Vegas, Nevada

I have not been meditating, creating music, interacting with people living on the streets, hiking... with the heat, exercise is very limited, even taking a shower or cleaning my room has not been happening. I've been very sporadic with this blog, not processing photos... all this is a recipe for disaster. Am I depressed? I don't think so. There is just very little motivation or energy. The heat surely has a lot to do with it and my age, blah... blah... blah. It is what it is. Although, I'm loving Mo to the fullest. He brings total joy to my life and makes it feel complete. I still read the news everyday... could do without that. Watching enjoyable television shows that I've downloaded from the internet inspires me with life. Life feels like it is burning out. All is good.