Raggin' Piano Boogie

 

 
HIS SPIRIT LIVES ON! ... BONER, THE PIANO DOG ... November 27, 1994 ... February 20, 2010

Use the links to the left to read a past Month or Year... and then there is always your Backspace to return to a past page.

July 31, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

I am really out of it today. Forced myself to go see a movie. They raised the early bird rates from $4 to $6.50 and that extra money is an issue for me. That little, I don't have. In a month and I will be on the streets if something does not happen. Everyday, I do the best I can there is just no desire to make money even to survive. I always said, when the money is gone I'll do something to make money again or just walk into the woods and never come out. The later is a viable option except for the fact that I made a commitment to take stewardship of Mo for his lifetime and I would never leave him knowing how dependent he is on me. Myself, I've lived a full life and have no fear of dying but I also know that deep down I don't get to choose. I'll be around as long as I am serving a purpose... I suppose. The issue of money has been such a pain in the ass for my life. I've made it, I've spent it, I'm sixty four years old and my thoughts about it are... did that, done that... its over. I looked into social security and will get practically nothing because I've always invested what I've made back into my work so, little taxes were paid throughout life. I was even audited once and found to be legit concerning that. Asking for contribution has become as burnt out for me as was booking performances and other musical jobs throughout life became before this present journey began.


July 30, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

We got through another day in the heat... across the street from the Salvation Army for a couple hours while people were being served dinner and just hanging around we created music. For anyone who plays the piano our presence is a special joy. People who we give water to late at night on the streets downtown know us with appreciation. I have no idea who they are as we interact in the dark. Everyone knows Mo. They walk a distance of two and a half miles each way to get something to eat and its over a hundred degrees even at night. The shade umbrella broke again in a wind gust, I'm hoping my friend around the corner at the auto repair might be able to fix it. I bring him dinner on Mondays and Tuesdays so he's really into helping me when possible in appreciation. This computer I am using is crazy with the keyboard working sometimes, sometimes not, with specific applications and then not with others. Sometimes its how I hit the keys, on the upper left corner of a letter, square in the middle, etc... there is no rhyme or reason.

July 29, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

Mo and I set our record for working with the Traveling Pano in heat today. It was a hundred fifteen degrees. The shade and breeze saved our asses. Also the love from those suffering in this heat while living in it twenty four hours a day and sleeping on the hot sidewalks got us through. The first words spoken to me on arrival, "thank you for coming out to be with us in this heat." Two weeks ago I had a colonoscopy and missed a Tuesday (today is Monday) and people are still talking about how weird it felt with my not being there. I arrived a half hour late today hoping the temperature would drop some and a volunteer who got there before me mentioned how weird it was not to see us setup and doing our thing. I did not need to put out too much energy because other people wanted to play. One guy, a really rough looking guy just wanted to sit with me so we could create music together on the piano seat. That was significant to me with how much he just wanted to do something an activity with someone as a friend. I get that totally. Mo was fine in the heat until the end, his "work" frame of mind was not so clear as in listening to direction and my patience was not enough, but we got through it. Mo loves me totally but he will always be a dog with his own mind and choices. I've always said, he has zero obedience in him. He's just a good dog who chooses to behave as needed over and beyond his natural instincts... ninety, nine percent of the time, lol.

July 28, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

Today was I'm pretty sure the most dangerous day I've had physically. There were many factors involved. A hundred ten degrees in the morning is different from a hundred ten in the early evening, its harsher. Then, there was no breeze. Then, even though it was an hour before, I had a bagel with cream cheese also, I did not have my usual dump to clean out my system before leaving. Even though my body was hydrated it was not enough. Most importantly I was not "fully" rested from sleep. When I got back to my place I knew something was wrong. There was a strain over my heart and I slept most of the day, lounged in the pool, felt nauseous, could not fall asleep again until 6am. So... I just need to be very, very careful. Mo, he was also at a breaking point. He got crazy in the truck cab for the short distance home and ran across the parking lot like a maniac. At the door he was showing me how the pads of his feet were burning from the short run. All is good. People appreciate our effort greatly. They come to this monthly food bank just to see us not just for the food. Want to know how I know this? They tell me. And, that makes it all worth while because I need to feel needed and I enjoy fulfilling the needs of others emotionally as a human being and one more... I love people and the fun, friendship and respect that the Traveling Piano offers. Without question, Mo needs to get out everyday and even more enjoy the stimulation of being around people even if for a short period of time. Mo is my world. His care and health mentally, physically and spiritually is a priority equal to mine.

July 27, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

Tonight, we did something I've been thinking about for a couple of years. When it got dark we went down onto the run down area of the strip where a couple hundred homeless people sleep on mats in an area called the courtyard to create music and lull everyone to sleep. I parked the Traveling Piano across the street and played into the night for about an hour from 9pm to 10pm. It was an experiment that did not work out very well. Afterwards I went over to ask if anyone could hear the music and the answer was no because of the large fans that were blowing above everyones head. I still like the idea and will pursue it because during the day is just too damm hot to play. The temperature is now at a hundred and ten!!! At night it is still a hundred. The few people that found the music while they were walking on the street of course were blown away by the whole experience. I put a picture of Mo up today because he is just so wonderful and I need him so much in my life right now. He's really keeping the joy going for me. The piano was at only 50% tonight. Its just dying quick and I don't have the $1500 to replace it.

July 26, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

Sometimes it feels like I can't help myself with doing what I do. It is almost like I cannot stop. Then I need to remind myself that I do, is because I enjoy it. There is fulfillment, immediate gratification, purpose and validation in my work all around for both myself and others. Who would not want that? Unless, of course your just self centered, angry and vengeful and worse... want to be that way. God forbid that side of human nature ever seeps into my soul! After playing at the mission center Mo and I took to the streets with my backpack full of refrigerated water. It is over a hundred degrees after midnight now, and people are so out of it they can't even open their eyes to say wether they want a bottle of water or not. I can see that when I ask... so tonight for the first time I just put water into people's hands while they are passed out. It will turn hot but its better than nothing.



Two people who know me on the streets commented on my music. I'll always be amazed at how people who look so non-articulate can be so deep and amazingly articulate. One guy told me he now goes to the library to listen to classical music because of me. Another guy who could not look more deranged and from the hood, told me how my music brIngs peace to him, it enlightens his soul. I get more from one person saying something like that then a hundred people get from my work! All I get done in a day these days is whatever commitment I have and the street walk at night. That zombies me out of energy but I must find a way to do more like raise money quickly to pay my rent.

July 25, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

While playing at the mission center dinner for about 600 people today I thought, "stop beating yourself for getting up so late". (2pm today) When I get enough rest I have enough energy to do the job. Everything works out just perfect. I'm fresh and strong with my playing and I can last non-stop for the two hours that I am there. Someone donated about 50 cases of bananas to the mIssIon center so I was able to get a case to give out on the streets. At night, I filled my usual backpack with twenty bottles of cold water from my fridge and then filled another backpack with about fifty bananas cool and absolutely, perfectly big and fresh. I felt a bit weird to be carrying bananas and water for three miles late at night through downtown Las Vegas and thought, "what if no one wants them"? I had to be very careful not to crush them. They went faster than the water! I need to really get a check on myself as to how much I do. Avoiding burn out and not over doing it physically is critically important. People are so very loving and appreciative. I ran into a couple that reminded me of my offer to play piano for their wedding some day. The offer still stands and I hope they get off the streets soon.



Its summer and there are huge cockroaches crawling everywhere because thats what they do at night. They crawl on people laying on the ground but they do not know it or just do not care because they are so heat exausted. On the way back Mo and I almost found our way into a perfect storm. We were at a busy intersection and he had been doing fine off leash but... a guy was on the corner waiting for the light swaying like he was going to pass out which made Mo nervous and then both an ambulance and police... vehicle sirens and lights blasting started towards us, and then with confused traffic in four directions and my yelling for Mo to "STAY"... one of Mo's few weakness's kicked in. When in fear he bolts. He went into the middle of the street and stood weaving as everything was convening down on him at the same time and there was no helping him but... my dog has a mind of his own, always has. He was not going to listen to me because the weaving guy was making him more nervous than to take direction. He crossed the street on his own and stayed on the other side waiting until everything passed and I got to him. Thank God he did not try to run back across the street to get to me. He knew that was not a good idea. It was intense, very intense.

July 24, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

Today is the day I take for me to do whatever I want, like something to enjoy myself but I can't get up early enough to do much and then I don't want to use the truck to do anything at night because I don't want to return to find no parking spot inside the complex. That's all just blah, blah from putting out effort to do something. Although, there is truth to the fact that I don't have any money to do much. Well, I ended up floating in the apartment complex's scummy pool for a few hours. The water is finally hot enough. Cold water, I can't do. Also, the day was spent watching a lot of comedy television on my computer. Watching a comedy everyday really helped me to get the journey going back in 2006. I need mindless comedy in my life. Call it levity.

July 23, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

We headed out today to our usual Tuesday spot. The fear of going into the heat is always worse then the actual doing of it. We were graced once again with cloud cover so that made it easy. A few young volunteers that are often across the street working with the food serving came over for the first time. The youngest guy was a monster pianist! What a surprise that was. He played with amazing technique and I knew how difficult it was for him to play on the piano with the notes that do not play, the keyboard action not responding well, the volume level all the way up because it no longer works... He's been coming out to volunteer for like a year and I always find it curious why and what inspires people to finally jump into the Traveling Piano experience. It so reminds me how we must allow people to find there own way in their own time and if we do that... they will eventually in fact find their way. Wow, I am such a prime example of that as my life moves forward in many ways much slower than other people. There are many, many examples of my saying and showing that in this blog.

July 22, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

It is a brutal a hundred ten degrees out and actually a little humid to make it worse but... there were clouds blocking the sun and that made everything functional. I feel for those on the streets who have no reprieve as in an air-conditioned room to go into or a cold shower to have. Even at night the temperature does not go under a hundred. But... still, there was musical Traveling Piano Fun, Friendship and Respect to be had and I am so appreciative that I can offer that for others. Although personally, playing on the piano is really not fun at all for me and that is a huge problem to get solved right away. It is now operating at about 50%. The piano is broken and worn. Just like my body, lol. Last night I went out with a record breaking 30 bottles of refrigerated water in a back pack to hand out on the streets and wow, can we talk exhausted? Seriously, I feel weak in leg muscles I can not ever remember feeling before, lol! Again, I am so grateful to be able to do it. We must... take care of each other!


July 21, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

The Traveling Piano keyboard that goes into the piano facade on the truck has seen its time. It was refurbished once and to do it again will not work. Several key notes no longer work, the middle sections action is responding only 50%, the volume slider and usb slot no longer work and the sounds are wavering. Since I purchased it years ago, Yamaha has discontinued this piano in the series. No other professional keyboard is made without bells and whistles. I only use the acoustic sound. A used (rare to find) or floor model keyboard would not be trustworthy. It is the Digital Piano Yamaha Keyboard P255B. There are two in Japan online thats it. The cost $1480 - $280 Shipping - $000 Me. Then there is the newest in the series, the Digital Piano Yamaha Keyboard P515. That's $1500 plus $300 for insurance, if it breaks in three years I just take it in for a replacement no repairs. As most people understand, I have taken a vow of poverty with the Traveling Pano's work through no fee's, tips or commercial affiliation, 12 years running now. Any miracle workers, angels that can come through for the Traveling Piano's work?

July 20, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

I was having what was feeling like a wasteful day not doing what it felt like A thought came through, what do I want to do? Luckily an answer came to mind. Go to Redrock for a walk with Mo, that is what I wanted to do and did. Once the sun sets behind the mountains the hundred and ten degrees goes into the low 90's, 80's even. Then with a breeze, it is just awesome. We took a new route and it was full of greenery. At one point the mountains were so grand it felt like Zion National Park. We got back as the park was closing and there were three people hanging out. It was perfect for a Traveling Piano experience but I felt too tired to do it.



Then a conversation began, they were here in Las Vegas for work from Washington State which of course I love that state and we talked and talked until it got late and dark. Feeling energized, I suggested we go to a parking area outside the exit of the park so I could show them the Traveling Piano and thats what we did. I also created music for my self, just a short time but it felt glorious. The entire time hiking, I felt nothing but gratitude for the experience of the amazing nature everywhere, the silence was everything. The Traveling Piano work happened because my intent had been set when I woke up. Fun, Friendship, Respect with Musical Empowerment and Inspiration.

July 19, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

I went to social services yesterday to see if as a senior, there are any benefits to help me out financially. They told me to come back today an hour before the place opens to get right in and out, first come first serve. So as anyone knows who reads this blog how almost impossible... I got up at six and was at the door by six thirty waiting until eight. Then myself with four others who were first... waited another three hours while everyone went in ahead of us until we began to scream bloody murder. When all was said and done I was told they can't help me with anything there, I must be enrolled with social security. I left the place feeling like a bum who just got turned away from trying to steal scraps and drove over to social security, saw the 300 people waiting, turned around and left. Once before I looked into social security and I think the most I'll ever get from that is a hundred somethIng a month if... I can get it. Mo and I drove home, took a nap and then went to the mIssIon to create music for the dinners. While there, I handed out some contribution flyers to volunteers. Good luck wIth that Danny! Ha.

July 18, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

I'm a little out of it today, probably because of yesterday. At the mission center while playing music for the dinners, the energy was kind of strange, I could not tell if it was the people or me. There was a quiet stillness. Maybe because most of the people were half dead from the heat and trying to survive in it. I cannot remember when it was last under a hundred degrees during the day. It has been a few weeks now. When I was finished playing music I handed out flyers to the volunteers for some Traveling Piano support. It does not feel like anything will come from it as there are as many reasons people support and volunteer as there are people. My job is to just do the footsteps. So, afterwards when I got back to my place I could have gone to sleep for the night but I have all this refrigerated water ready to give out on the streets. Along with twenty bottles of water in my backpack, Mo and I took to the streets for a walk to do what needed to get done. While walking I was thinking how some people like to fed pigeons. I prefer to feed people. While some people say they like dogs more than people... I like people more than dogs. It has something to do with self-respect. I've heard all the arguments and the bottom line is that of course it s easier to love something that you have control over, that is dependent on you. The unconditional love is great. When it comes from people it is greater.

July 17, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

Today, I had a Colonoscopy. I wasn't worried. The biggest part of it was to ask someone to drive and pick me up and also to watch Mo during the time. I could have left Mo home also if needed. The only other concern was for the place being another sleazy strip mall medical hole. It wasn't. It was clean and the people seemed to know what they were doing. In life it always feels like there is no one to help me but in reality I have learned that feelings are not always facts that really, I just don't want to ask anyone for help. The first person I asked said he would help.His name is Brian, he volunteers at the field where we go every Monday, he knows and likes Mo and went out of his way to work around his work schedule to help me with the ride both ways as well as with Mo. I can't express how much he made the entire situation a breeze for me. All I had to do was to show up. Brian by the way is a Catholic Knights of Columbus guy, I think he's actually the guy in command for one of the chapters. I mention this because it is really important to note in todays world Catholics who walk the walk in helping people. The bad ones get all the limelight. I was born and raised fundamental catholic, that was in another life time but I've kept the good parts with me and friends like Brian remind me of the good parts.

July 16, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

How much I share about myself as appropriate, I always ask myself. The purpose is always to be helpful. I am 37 years clean from alcohol, pot and drugs today. I am not looking for condolences or praise. It is being written because I want people to know what makes me tick more than anything else. Being clean is what makes me tick. The grace of God has given me the ability to ask for help, trust and therefore think in different ways through specific habits, groups of people and steps to take. Being in contact with others who also have chosen my path, like minded people in general help to keep me living through gratitude. Ever wonder where the anger, arrogance and abrasiveness in some of my posts comes from in me? The disease of alcoholism and addiction is always present, even after all these years and ready to take me down. Ever wonder why I am of such service for the world through my work on the Traveling Piano as well as people living on the streets?



That is how I deal with and control the disease. I have learned to "act out" anger through love. Ever wonder how I got so good with clarity, being direct, confident and honest through my anger, arrogance and abrasiveness? Most people who read this blog do not see that very much. It is more on social media that I lash out. It comes through conscious responsibility and practice, the ability to work through and accept mistakes with humility. Life is work for me. I have been trudging the road of happy destiny. The result has been beyond my wildest of dreams. As I look back I can say that I've had a fucking amazing life with "all" the ups and downs! And... as many people have said who know me well, "Danny, if you can do it, anyone can!" So here's to another day... clean. Seriously, the success of my life has been to live it one day at a time!

July 15, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

I was very concerned about having Mo out in the heat today with it begin a hundred fifteen degrees. Myself, I dreaded doing it but the commitment part of myself said, just do it. So when we got there at th field where we go every Monday, the temp had gone down five degrees and then once the sun went down it was better. It is never as bad as I project and as I have said before, all of us together creates strength and support. At first I was just going to let Mo stay in the cab with the windows open and air conditioner running but it was not necessary. In the shade he's not moving around and it is comfortable, warm but comfortable. There were more people wanting to play the piano then I can remember so I did not have to play so much. A women who has known us for over a year got on to play. Of course she knows us, but I don't know her.



We've never interacted and she is just one of many in the crowds we are in. She was really enjoying herself with musical exploration and I could tell really needed it. What empowers people to play on the Traveling Piano after seeing us for long periods of time will always be a mystery. It is like one day they just decide... I'm going to do it. Always, it is gratifying for me because it just shows that people who never interact or even look at us are noticing in their own ways and appreciating from afar and a desire that grows little by little through trust until they just dive in. Six of the piano keys are not not playing. It feels like a downward rush to the end between the piano and my computer keyboard. Which will become totally inoperable first? Is it all ending?

July 14, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

Today was to be my nature day but I just could not get going. I could use the heat at a hundred fifteen degrees as an excuse or the fact that I could not tear myself off of Facebook rantIng. In knowing I am very good with words at times and cutting through the bull... it really is nothing but a distraction from living life in the present moment. I got outside just in time for sunset at Redrock and the temperature although warm, is always very nice at the end of the day. Also, it being the end of the day and so hot everywhere else, there were not many people around which is always good for me. I really needed to have some musical interaction with people more than hike so that is what I went for. Although, it is getting more difficult as the days move forward.



It seems to be a race in time which is going to go totally first, this computer or the piano. The computer now has three keys that do not work. I'm copying and pasting the e-i-8's and capitalization's and that is time consuming, not fun. The piano beat that out today with six crucial keys not working. Let me tell you, it takes a lot of concentration and work around, to try and create beautiful music when your missing the main notes to create it with. I do not have the money to get myself back into working order and the thought of once again looking for funding is excruciating. But something will need to happen because losing my place to live will be next. Oh, the drama! You would think none of this would affect me anymore. It is not like any of it is remotely new. Worse maybe, but not new, lol.

July 13, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

I took the truck over to Faddy one of the owners of a new high end car dealership around the corner from me. He offered to detail that Traveling Piano for me because he appreciates my work in the community. The truck is very cruddy, the fabric and floor. He worked on it four hours and gave up for the day. Next week he will do some more work with it. People like this are very empowering for me. Later in the day I had dinner with a guy named Vince to talk about ideas. It took two years to finally sit down together! He has a non-profit food service truck and wanted to talk with me about what, where and how I play on the streets. Also, I wanted to see how I might hookup with his work. There was no Traveling Piano work that I could do today. Once the temperature goes over a hundred five, there is no way I can operate.

July 12, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

It is really difficult to stay focused in this heat that is over a hundred degrees every day. It is times like this I am glad I am at the mission center on Fridays although I do work up a sweat there playing. Always, I'm trying to move away from politics and the bad news online, it is my main form of distraction. I scored four large cases of water today so that should help. I refrigerate bottles of water then take them out when I go walking with Mo to give to people laying on the sidewalks. It is a wonderful way to vent anger verses ripping new butts on line where there are none to begin with as in doing that really does not make a difference, I think. I must create some money and want to move away from fundraising as I have done and move more into the dreams of the journey. To remember to remember... thats the trick. Doing both the work and then the fundraising for the work which is work... this gets more difficult as I get older.

July 11, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

While playing at the mission center today I could see my music emotionally affecting people in different ways. It is important, when I can to allow eye contact of appreciation. After all this time I am still afraid of it while creating music. I understand it all in an intellectual way but emotionally there is still a disconnect as in, how can this be? Trust is the issue. Last night I was watching an interview with a rapper who gets out of control and uses bipolar issues to rationalize it. They enjoy the disorder in themselves because it is who they are and want to express themselves throughout the world with it. They think they are great because of it. The problem with people like this is that, as a result of their disease, they are narcissist on dangerous and deep levels and... they do not realize there is a deeper aspect that must be recognized. They could not care less how they affect people and the world, that they are part of the human race, an individual part of the whole... not the whole themselves. I say, step down. If you cannot be responsible concerning how your narcissism affects the world in dangerous and irresponsible ways then you are not to be empowered with it just as other mental disorders in people who are a narcissistic danger to society as a whole.

July 10, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

Mo and I spent the day giving the Traveling Piano, the truck bed, tires, etc... a paint job in air-conditioning! The new high end used auto dealer around the corner let me drive the truck inside thier place to do the work. That is a lot of points scored for them. They are going to detail the cab for me in a few days no charge just because they are good people! Who does that? As this blog shows, people are revealing themselves... last year the dentist, this year the auto repair and now this. I'm trying to organize my head into a way of making money and going forward. I should be easy on myself as it has only been three years trying to move forward, right? The "i" on my computer stopped working a few days ago and then began working today and just stopped again in that last sentence! Lol, I must copy and paste all my "i",s until I can afford to repair the computer. At night I jumped into the complex pool for the first time this year and my body was in shock when sleeping because of the physical activity of swimming for just a short time.

July 09, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

So... today is my Birthday (64) and it was going to be a nothing day but now, I've decided to enjoy it thanks friends on Facebook. The option to post on my timeline is off so people have been private messaging me from all around the world! Validation is so wonderful when it is unexpected. It is powerful! Hundreds of people! But here's the thing... I derive a great deal of satisfaction in knowing that people from all walks of life worldwide appreciate me... see and know my work. It has been a life long dream to accept and be accepted by all kinds of people from everywhere. So I felt very grateful all day. At our usual Tuesday commitment with the Traveling Piano a bunch of friends from the street jumped onto the truck and my friends who serve the dinner jumped in front of the piano for a birthday picture for me. It was hot and hectic, a fight broke out and it was amazing to see how one guy took control and everyone became somewhat sane and friendly again.



Last night, a guy who lives on the streets, I told him it is my Birthday and he handed me $20. An extra large pepperoni, mushroom pizza with extra cheese is going to happen with that! Then today another friend Patrick handed me a twenty. I went to the movies with it afterwards. I sent a request to my apartment management to fIx the door to get into the place. The back door to the complex is broke now more than not and everyone who leaves must go around the block to enter. No one wants to say anything because the guy is a bully. I also asked to please clean the scummy pool so we can use it as it is already the second month of summer. Management retaliated by sending me a notice that they want to see my receipt for rental insurance which s required. That is the kind of place I've been living in. But screw them... right after that email came through, another email from my friend Mani in Singapore came through sending me a hundred bucks for my birthday and that covered the cost of the rental insurance! Happy Day.

July 08, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

Finally, I found the umbrella position that completely shields Mo on the piano from the sun. It is at least a hundred degrees everyday! We go to a place called "The Field" on Monday's where people pickup resources and community gathers for a fresh cooked dinner that random people serve for whomever wants to partake. Mo and I go early so people can play some piano for themselves before the action starts. Then I create music while everything is happening. My friend Mica sometimes is chomping at the bits to get on to the piano seat before we are even setup. He just bangs on random musical notes to express himself and I love that!

July 07, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

In my waking sleep I was very depressed this morning about my situation, the not having the energy or inspiration to work for money to continue onward. I feel alone which I know is not true. The need to possibly let go of life as I know it with my computer work my daily diary blogs, the processing of pictures and sharing them online, documenting this journey... all of that has always been fifty percent of my work but the computer's life is fading fast and the costs to keep going with it are too much for me to deal with. The work gives me focus, it grounds me in purpose with understanding and clarity. Going out to ask for contribution and for personal help seems insurmountable. Working with the Traveling Piano in this heat with my age and being so out of shape, that all limits my work to only a couple hours a day. Well, I decided I would allow myself to feel depressed just for today and do nothing. Then, pick myself up by my bootstraps and continue on tomorrow.



But see... here I am writing this blog on a backup computer with its own problems that prevent work but, it does type its "i" and "e" and numbers, etc... lol. I can still do some work it just takes four times the amount of time and a lot more thinking to know where everything is... while switching back and forth between computers. What keeps me alive is this grace that I have been given. The grace is to have gratitude in and for life. I learned how to accept that grace from others, God's speaking and working through others. It was always there innately since I was born but I did not know how to manifest it. Gratitude begins with feeling and thought. Then manifestation follows. Feeling comes from love, faith and a deep knowing in my soul that beyond the physical, all is perfect. So... see me who can get up at two in the afternoon today because I choose to do so. How many have that luxury? I have companionship with my pup Mo, a roof over my head for the month, plenty of food, a birthday in two days that I will find a way to feel good about.



Next week the celebration of a true miracle, that of being clean and sober for thirty seven years! There are many, many friends that I have who appreciate, love and support me. A few actually send me some financial support monthly. The fact that most giving to me will never be enough or so I have been taught in life and not in the ways I need it... that is just a dysfunctional part of my mind... I know it when I am able to be honest with myself. How many people have been able to create and have a life in the ways I have, in the ways that I need... in order to be of service to the world. I may not have fulfilled all my dreams physically but I have in fact fulfilled my spirit and soul overwhelmingly in this life. Plus, I have n fact fulfilled many, many dream both big and small. Spirit and soul is all I really care about. The greatest gift I have been able to give to myself through the grace of God in this life has been the ability to ask for help. I have learned to ask for help in spite of those who will attack me for doing so.



I have learned to ask for help without expectation and no matter how exhausting and time consuming it is to do. Asking for help is a way of life for me. When given help, a responsibility exists of my own making to manifest that giving and return it at least double. How much I am given has no relevancy, it is in the giving, period. Through the responsibility, this is where I find my joy in and for life. I'm going to stop now before my thoughts begin to have agenda! But... I did go online and ask for suggestions with this computer. Someone offered to pay for an external keyboard as a work around so that gave me the incentive to go get a cheap one. It helped because I could not even get into my computer as the password as letters that are not working on the keyboard. It was a reminder of how gratitude also I am in the ability to take suggestions... sometimes when they are presented correctly and the timing s right.

July 06, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

My God it was not easy getting going today but I did. So much, I did not want to play out in the hundred five degree heat but I did, later in the day. I've made a commitment to play out on Main street every Saturday and the two business I want to develop a relationship with, they were wondering where I was last week so I could not miss this week. I had to go visit the gallery where I have a few photos hanging. Got some medicine for my butt. Went to another doctor this week, another really bad abusive one who actually hurt me with no qualms about it. Then I went to pick up some flyers that the mission center said they would make copies for me to solicit contribution from volunteers. The people on the street today were mostly homeless. One guy said our interaction cleansed his spirt. Everyone usually says something significant like that. The Traveling Piano and spirt working through Mo and myself is very healing and comforting for people. That is why I do what I do in the way I do it. Ok now, this really hurts to say... my computer s gong fast. If I disappear from posting here it is because I know longer have a way to communicate.



No email... no computer... no way to seek help and contribution from online. I can use my phone only for calls, not for the internet. 215 639 9378. (you would need to leave a message). I have no money to take the computer into a shop for repair. It has been going for a long while. The sound, ports, display, battery and now the keyboard. Every time I go for an "i" or "e" I must press them several times and it is getting worse every time. It is taking me an hour to write this blog because need to copy and past I's and e's every time. How ridiculous s that? That partcular stroke on the computer is needed for processing pictures and for signing in and out of accounts. Anyone in Las Vegas willing to help pay forward servce so the Traveling Piano... can continue sharing online for the world? The website is huge... it would be a shame to end this blog and the sharing of it with the world... daily for twelve years now! I must garner monthly contributions but now I do not have a way to do that. Ahh... for the days when had my own back as in paid my own way (twelve years) and then when a generous contributor had my back (two years).

July 05, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

At the mission center today a guy from the church group volunteering as in the past, wanted to play on the piano and people just cannot understand that my time, energy, effort, commitment and volunteerism I take seriously. It is not dispensable on the whim of anyone, any group or organization to switch me out when convent for them especially when am there and have begun to work. It is disrespectful and I will not have it. After some terse words with the volunteer coordinator, I did not turn over the piano to the guy but did spend the entire time talking while I created music. He played and sang when I was done and we continued talking for another hour as he played. He s a music director for a fundamentalist Christian church in town. Sad part about these connections, they are never for the sake of relationship building.



Having made a deep spiritual investment n talking with the guy as well as the time I would hope to continue and grow together n that spirituality but it has never happened. Even to the point of offering hm a platform for his ministry on the Traveling Piano truck to sing and play. Its never happened yet. I've come to learn that usually there is a lack in true sincerity of intent. One of these days would like to be surprised with a followup. The music I am posting today was from a few years ago I uploaded t to Youtube. A piano stream of consciousness musical Improvisation while on a sandy beach with water turquoise blue, palm trees waving in the wind, the sun shinning bright in peace, all a moment in time... in the Florida Keys, USA 2014

July 04, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

I created music in what felt like an altered state of mind today. People loved it while I just wondered about it with interest listening and creating the same old with a different clarity. This morning there was a huge earthquake in the dessert. I could feel a swaying and it made me dizzy as I stood thinking about what to do and then... it was over. It being the 4th of July, I'm happy to say, I Love America... I believe in my heart this country is the last best hope for all mankind and what makes us great is what we believe in... that all men are created equal. We believe in life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Here is the problem with high ideals... you actually have to live up to them. So in this present time of acute trouble we must do everything in our power to eradicate the power and voice of greed and hate... to overcome those that would hijack our ideals for their self-serving agendas. Those who would enslave and allow lives to live in squalor at the boarder of America, they are not true Americans. Our Statue of Liberty has on it... “Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free.” That is who we are and what we are about, no exceptions. Happy 4th of July! Tonight Mo and I went to a high spot in the neighborhood to watch the fireworks. They are amazing at 360 degrees and go on for hours here in Las Vegas.

July 03, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

My neighbor who owns Quality AutoWorks around the corner from me fixed the air conditioning in my truck today and I now have cold air for the first time in thirty years, no kidding! It is amazing that no one has been able to identify the problem before through all these years. I was not charged any money for the repair. I went to a colon expert today and just found another scummy doctor. He was abusive in his treatment of me, I was actually screaming in pain while he examined me without care. I know what was going on, old man, Medicaid, no money, masochistic with a lot of money... I don't make this stuff up. And then to top the day off someone asked if I am homeless. Ugh, ha and all the rest. Makes me think, am I hanging around homeless people too much? I do need better clothes and some homeless people have more money than me... what happened with the repair shop... that made my day. If your reading this please set up a monthly subscription on the contribution page .to help keep us going.

July 02, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

The people who usually serve dinner on the street where I go on Tuesdays do not do it on the first Tuesday of the month so I did not go today. It is really too hot, never under a hundred degrees. This computer I am typing on is wearing out fast. First it was the sound, than the ports, then the viewing screen, the battery needs to be replaced and now the keyboard is going. The "i" and "e" do not work I must keep hitting them several times to make them work. There is zero money to refurbish or buy a new one. If these posts stop you will know why. How I will do email is not going to be easy. I do not use my phone for email and rarely to look on line with my phone. That just will never work for me and of course I cannot process pictures on a phone. All my filing must be done on a computer. I have my system and that s not going to change. My contact with the world, it may stop but its not gong to change.


July 01, 2019

Las Vegas, Nevada

Yowza, it was hot today! People say, "I don't know how you do it." I tell them the people I am with are in this heat twenty four hours a day and I am in it for only a few. It was a hundred and five degrees out! I just stayed very aware of my energy but really did not have to. When my energy began to sink, I knew it. Even though it was difficult for Mo, firecrackers in the distance was all he could think about. It is truly amazing that he knew the fourth of July was coming two days ago and a firecracker was not needed to know. He just became cautious and aware and paranoid and am totally curious to how he can know this exact time of year. I know he knows, no question about it. Traveling Piano dog Bo... he used to know also. I created a flyer asking for people to contribute with a monthly subscription on this website. It is specifically geared to the volunteers we work with every week at the field where we were tonight. Some people will get upset that I am asking for their help or at least uncomfortable. How they receive it is not my job. My job is to just ask. I have zero expectation concerning it but again, it is not my job to expect anything also. I told one homeless guy that I was doing it and he just kept encouraging me while saying please don't end up out in this hell on the streets. He was saying how the worst aspect is his constantly being chased away from... everywhere. This is why homeless people try their best to dress as well as possible and stay as clean as possible, so that they can blend in because there is nothing worse than to be constantly rejected by others and told to go away, get out, etc... One of the homeless outreach centers printed forty copies of th flyer for me and I really appreciated that as every penny counts these days.