HIS SPIRIT LIVES ON! ... BONER, THE PIANO DOG ... November 27, 1994 ... February 20, 2010
Use the links to the left to read a past Month or Year... and then there is always your Backspace to return to a past page.
October 31, 2013
We drove to Pasadena, Maryland today and are staying with my friends Bonnie and Dave. Tomorrow I am to get the piano cover replaced and am prepared to shell out seven hundred dollars for nothing if necessary. I'm going to ask the guy if he can do the job as I need it done and if he can not feel totally confident in doing the job, I'm going to pay him for his materials and time and cut my losses. I just can't tolerate dealing with water sitting in the back on stretched canvas from rain, or constant snap repair or tears in the fabric. I need a job done where I just don't have to think about the piano and equipment tarp cover or protection from any kind of weather. There are too many other things to worry about. The first cover lasted ten years. Now since the journey began this will be the fourth attempt to achieve the quality of that first cover. It had been hand sewn by six old ladies who all have now passed. The fall color on the trees are at their peak, I was enjoying that for the two and a half hour drive. Once I arrived at my destination I had to hold back from creating music in the neighborhood for the halloween trick or treaters. It was too dark and my friends wanted to spend time. It was difficult to leave this today. Each time I leave to go anywhere it gets more difficult. I shake, I'm in a fog, don't feel any natural easy motivation. I can't seem to find a feeling of fun anticipation.
October 30, 2013
The temperature on a sign read eighty-one degrees. It felt like spring today. I found myself driving to Hancock Maryland to create music by the river before all the leaves feel off the trees. People who found us were very happy about that fact. I drifted deeper than normal into music today. As it began to get dark, the last lady on the piano seat with her little boy mentioned they were in town for the parade. Parade? Hancock was having a big Halloween parade that the entire county participates in. My first impulse was to get out of town while I still could but then I kept trying to tell myself to stay and watch it. As that I idea took hold I thought, "you can't watch a parade, you have to be "in" it!" Then I began to fight that idea. Then I remembered how many Halloween parades I used to perform in during my career and how much fun they were. Then I began to worry about having enough energy. Then I thought if I was going to do it, the end would be the only place but did not want to hang around for an hour parade to pass before I got going. Then I thought to just drive to the starting point to see the lay of the land so to speak and see if the people running the parade were around. It was the mayor Dan who is also the local vet I have used for both Boner and Mo when I am in this area of the country.
It felt sort of meant to be so off I drove to find someone who knows how to use a stick-shift. We decided to pre-hype the parade route back and forth and then get out of town before the actual parade began. I found an old guy who was iffy about driving and then a guy I met back in July walked by with his wife and new baby in a stroller. He called the other guy who was with him when we originally met. That guy happened to live a few houses down so he came outside and drove the Traveling Piano for us. There was a large crowd down the main street of town. The first time through people were like, "whats going on" since the Traveling Piano was being a parade unto itself. Then going back the opposite way through the route people where like, "what was that." Hahaha... it was fun. I cranked my speaker up as loud as I could take it and played sloppy, unpracticed crazed, manic Boogie Woogie and Ragtime. I was thinking, "this is a lot more fun when I am getting paid." After it was all done I really enjoyed having played down the main street of Hancock and giving the community a little extra fun for their parade. Especially, I enjoyed running into mayor Dan and the two guys I had met before. On the way back to where we are staying, now with my funds low I wondered if I could ever go back to performing like I did in the past. During the halloween season I would sometimes do six or seven small town parades and make some good money. Naa... did that, done that. This year there has been some nostalgic experiences for me with my piano on the back of my truck but none of them would I want to live again for work.
October 29, 2013
Interestingly enough, I finished creating a picture collage of "buddies" and then drove to the park. As I pulled into the parking spot three old buddies arrived from a walk up the path. We had an exchange and later one of the guys came back with his wife. Meanwhile I had a few other interactions with people. One couple was coincidentally from Pasadena, Maryland where I will be traveling to later in the week to get a new truck cover made for the piano. Mo's ear is driving him crazy, he's got wax or an infection in it so I need to get some peroxide or something to help him out. The autumn season has a nostalgic feel to it for me and these days I'm feeling very nostalgic for a secure of a place that is my own to be live in and call home. The priority for my life is to get outside with the truck and create as much music and continue interacting with people as I do. I've been very fortunate to be staying where I am, thats an amazing miracle for what it is. If I was constantly traveling as before it would not be fun because, well first I would not be traveling... the truck would have died by now if I had been on the road for all of this last year.
October 28, 2013
Today was a reminder that I am doing exactly what I should be doing in life and also that I have a ferocious loyalty to express gratitude. We drove to the local park. It feels consistently clear that the people I met in the spot where I create music... we are supposed to meet. The second couple we met have been vacationing at the park for over twenty years. They had heard me creating music last year and were thinking about how awesome it would be if I appeared again this year. This year we met. They used the now most common word to describe the Traveling Piano experience in nature... "surreal." I had some deep personal discussion with both couples individually. They were consciously aware of their spirituality and a relationship with Jesus Christ. It came up in conversation both times almost instantly but with totally relief... not as in a need to express God's message. It was simply clear that we all had the same feelings about life and how to live it. What was interesting was that as I have become clear about having a personal relationship with Jesus Christ and... that it is no one else's business but mine as in the word "personal," so it is with the bible and people's relationship with the book. It is personal. It is meant for personal use, individual interpretation. Some religious people teach their own interpretations of the bible when they should be teaching people how to interrupt it for themselves, and how to accept all individual interpretations with respect. These chance meetings, I just love them. The first couple had made a random stop off the road to stretch their legs on a long drive from Pennsylvania to Norfolk, Virginia. Later I met a very interesting woman in her late seventies originally from Luxembourg. She was there through world war II and remembers the morning she woke up to look out her window to hear and see war planes flying overhead and then the tramping down the street of troops entering into her town. I was going to record music today but was too involved with my music in the moment to think about saving it for the future. Again as been happening more frequently, while creating music my friend Paul appeared in the distance, waved and then disappeared while walking down a path with his dog Molly.
October 27, 2013
About getting older... I took an extreme energy five hour thing yesterday but did not drink enough water... I should have drank at least a gallon because... can we talk constipation? I went to the movies with my friend Barbara to see Captain Phillips which was an awesome flick. It was the second time I got a $2.50 discount as a senior citizen, yikes!!! Before the sunset I went to create music in the park. A family who has been vacationing there for over thirty years found us. They were super dog lovers. Another guy had walked his dogs around the lake while listening to the music. We did not get a chance to interact but I could just feel how awesome the experience of the music was for him.
October 26, 2013
At eight in the morning on the dot exactly, I woke up after four hours sleep and laid in bed for about forty five minutes trying to decide if it was a gift from God that I woke up so early... wondering if I should take advantage of the opportunity to get out of bed or if I should go back to sleep. Really, I want to get up earlier in the mornings and get to bed earlier. It was freezing today but around 2 in the afternoon it began to warm up so I drove to a dog park near Charles Town, West Virginia an hour away. It has been a while since Mo played with other dogs and for me... I wanted to create some music in the sun. Nobody was really around to share the piano. I started to really sink (tired) and was trying to decide how long I would last without any energy. I opted for one of those five hour energy drinks that was sitting in my dashboard glove compartment for at least a year. On the way back we found a crazy patch of cotton growing. I stopped along side of the road to purchase some fresh vegetables (which were rip off prices) and then stopped at a supermarket to get fixens' to make a huge batch of vegetable soup. I'm really glad I did not stay out past dark. The roads around here are all hills and cannot get more curvy. My eye sight is not what it used to be. Damm, I can't believe I'm saying that like an old man. Spent the night cooking, glad to get this blog done today. I want to stay on track and not let time go by between entries.
October 25, 2013
It is imperative that I better structure my time. What a joke. God help me. Also, need to change my inner time clock. What is natural now for me is to go to bed around five or six in the morning and wake in the early afternoon. There is nothing lazy about it, I just work a night shift much better than day. Problem is... that does not work for the Traveling Piano being on the road or for me to get anything else other than creative work done. The idea of getting back out on the road and staying with strangers again is very difficult for me. I am not sure why. Maybe it is just getting too difficult for me to adjust myself constantly to different people, situations and environments. That can result in my wanting others to adjust themselves to me. Ha, not going to happen. The only way to make it work for me is to completely give myself up to others who invite me into their homes and remind myself that my work in life is to constantly reach out to other people in whatever ways are necessary to do my work because my work has proven itself to be worthwhile. I just need to feel welcomed wherever I go, allow that through people's basic generosity and not look for that feeling.
October 24, 2013
I created a collage of Traveling Piano Babies. Pictures are the way to go in conveying what the Traveling Piano is about. Single pictures do it if someone is willing to go through the time and effort to look. I am always trying new ways to reach more people and better show... but to what end? Must there be an end? I made an appointment to get a new truck cover made next week because the one I have is falling apart. It will be with a new material which really makes me feel uneasy. I've never worked with anything other than canvas. Getting people to do a good job and what I need has failed five times in the past and succeeded one and a half times so far. There is company in Maryland, helped with some small repairs at no cost last year and seem to know what they are doing, so I must trust. A cover for the Traveling Piano truck is unique so I am the only one with experience as to what is needed, what will happen if it is not crafted well and only they know how to craft, period.
October 23, 2013
The cold weather is here, like freezing... like it snowed and hailed today for a short while. I've been thinking about an old guy I met the other day who scoops dog poop from people's yards for a living. He and his wife have been building the business for eight years and now pulls in 180,000 a year with no overhead and gets lots of exercise outdoors. See... there are many things I could do for money! Was life easier when I financially had my parents to fall back on, friends who are now no longer friends, the money from the sale of my home? Friends are not a natural happening for me. Relationships are developed, nurtured, they take work. If one of the two parties in a relationship stop the work, the relating either becomes dysfunctional or I quite. I prefer quitting rather than dysfunction. There are relationships I have worked on for years by myself before quitting. It is difficult to create new relationships when you are not planted anywhere. Now, in my life there is nothing to fall back on. It is not like I am alone in the world like this. Many people find themselves in this situation without a moments notice. There are many friends in my life. They all offer pieces of support separately for my life. None that offer security for me in physical ways, they are all basically emotional support people. Next...my pathological issue with decisions and choice has reared its head once again. What do I want to do with my life. I suppose the answer lies in continuing to go out and do what I've been doing because... doing nothing and thinking about what I want to do results in wanting to do nothing. Thank God I have something to do I know works even though the ways of doing are needing to change.
October 22, 2013
Its feeling like I will now need money and influence to keep the Traveling Piano fun alive... I will not be able to do it on my own for much longer. If you would like to help click here... Contribution ...or if you prefer another way other than paypal please email me here... Contact
October 21, 2013
I met a beautiful woman in the park today. She's just floating around the earth as a dancer, specifically belly dancing. She's interested in Myofascial release which has to do with soft tissue therapy specifically for thin sheaths that surround skeletal muscle. We talked about how our bodies hold onto traumas that happen in life and this therapy helps to release all the physical "holding onto." So this is my last entry having to do with why I have begun to ask directly for contribution. Now I will just begin doing it with everyone on my email list. I've been writing about it for two months. I know what I am getting myself into. It will take a long time to send individual emails to everyone on my email list. A good ten thousand address will be retuned since I have not used them in years. Focus will be a major challenge... to not quit when I get exhausted or when I want to do other things or people derail me as I know I will be getting replies that will need immediate attention. To do it I've created a filing system. I used it for asking facebook friends. First, make a list of all the friends, then create ways to notate that I sent them the request, notate who responds, who is no longer a friend, bad email addresses, who de-friends me as a result of the request, input the data of conversations, replies, whether they said yes or no, if they contribute... how, by check, paypal, cash or whatever, random notes about everything....
It is all work, for me survival/living is work. It takes work to create service for the world. It takes work to give freely. The idea is to find a way to make my work fun. Giving freely to the world without commercial, political, organizational affiliation is work. Earning the finances in anyway in order to give... is work. The goal is to constantly readjust, have faith, stay flexible, accept and find new ways to "enjoy" the work... Protect the Enthusiasm for Giving. That is what I have been doing. A few friends have donated small amounts several times which really surprised me as I had not thought of that way. As they get money they send money. Thats what the subscription offering link on the Traveling Piano Contribution page is for. It is automatic and monthly. The giving little by little is fun for me and also adds up! I learned that some people need to be walked through the process of giving. They have had no experience and really are not capable of giving but want to. For others, it became like a little fun project to send some money. Some people want to wire money, like ten bucks into my bank account from other countries but it would cost them almost fifty bucks just to wire ten. I've been learning that I have friends all over the world from in remote small countries. People from all walks of life rich and poor, young and old and everything in-between... different personalities and styles and scary people.
October 20, 2013
After having shut down emotionally for all of yesterday, when I woke up this morning, first thing... I began to work with my tool of gratitude to get going... "thank you for the bed, the place to stay my dog, my body to get me around, having enough food, the ability to create music, enough money, etc..." that helped. Then I knew I would have to go out with the Traveling Piano truck and interact with people. Thats what I do to keep going. Having said it many, many times, my job is to reach out and connect. Then everything else will fall into place. I drove to the center of Berkeley Springs for a few hours with the Traveling Piano truck. When I feel needy, what I need to do is give. First thing that happened, a young girl I know from town gave me five dollars she had been saving for weeks to give to me because she knows how important it is at this time for my friends to contribute. Then she got me some muffins and a drink from the coffee shop to add to that, just to be nice. I know she has very little money. That fact that she extended herself to me... remembered to... was very significant for me. I thought, "validation for my decision to connect with people today." Then an unusual amount of people gave me small contributions without my asking... not even wanting. On the way out of town, I stopped at the supermarket to get some food and the bill came to almost exactly the amount people had given to me. I thought, "assurance." When I got back to where I am staying a friend from England sent me a hundred bucks, enough money that now I feel secure enough to go out and get a new truck engine. His contribution put me over the top so to speak, to empower me to move on. Its all about my doing the right things and then the right things happen.
When asking for contribution, some people think that simply suggesting something other than what I asked for releases them from responsibility concerning any action. They are not thinking that I may have already thought about or dissected completely just about every way of earning or raising money for my entire life or that I already know from the other thousands and thousands of suggestions that have been repeated over and over and over through the years. I get angry when someone tries to get something back or turn my request into agenda for themselves. This is an area where I need to do more work on myself, get rid of the anger in knowing the request is not about them its about the journey. I know that seems selfish to some people but it is the fact. The focus here is to get support for the Traveling Piano unconditionally because that is how I work myself. The reason why such a large amount of funds donated to charities like the Red Cross do not get used for the intended purposes are because of side agendas and paybacks. Also, people who need to be guilted into giving, or want me to work for contribution by prying money from their hands, or nagging them because they are procrastinators... I do not have the time or interest for that. Also, people who put me off... I'm not pursing them. Another area I really need to work on is in having tolerance for people who set up false hope with good intention, who say they will contribute and do not followthrough. Also, there are those who knowingly have no intention of following through but say they are going to. I have a big problem with all that. I'm not fundraising... the requests are friend-to-friend. I have always believed friends, community and family should be available for support when asked not only when needed. Objectivity is the key here as well as not taking results too personally.
October 19, 2013
It is so disappointing when I have relationships in life that are very intimate and personal, that I think will exist forever, and they end. Sometimes its my fault, sometimes the other person, sometimes a little of both. The woman who lives across from where I am staying, now in her 50's she has never grown up emotionally. As a child she only knows to scream and shout, hit and run, instigate and insidiously antagonize. I've written about it before concerning her and other neighbors... there are several classic backwoods rural family feuds going on where I have been staying and she is at the core for it all. She has never been trustworthy with other people and has been upfront about that fact with me in a very entitled way, because we have trusted each other. Thinking her bad character would never come in my direction... well, as I grow up in life I continue to learn this constant fact about people... when someone is hateful, revengeful and dysfunctional with all the relationships in their lives... to think its not going to happen in relationship with me at some point is wrong. I can spend my life walking on thin ice about it, avoiding the traps and potholes, constantly doing damage control and manipulating to keep everything nice... be the "special" one for them in life by embracing and accepting everything about them but eventually... the dysfunctional person eventually always affects my life and our relationship... not in a good way. It happened today with a confrontation that ended up with the police entering the picture. She called them thinking I would be scared but I was so relieved because... she was too stupid to realize that she was being totally irrational, insane and... if I had called the police it would have looked like I was instigating. Plus now there is a record of her insanity and the police gave me some tips on how to handle her. The problem... it shut me down emotionally for the entire day. I began to really dislike all people because of one. I started to bring all my fearful journey issues about relating with people into play in negative ways. It was good to end the day and go to bed. The wild New England asters I took a picture of for today (they go by many different names) one of my favorite wildflowers... I have a mommy attachment to them, lol... an emotional memory attachment relating to my mom.
October 18, 2013
At six in the morning I let Mo out to go to the bathroom before bed and thought, "thats the brightest moon I have ever seen" but I couldn't really see it because of clouds. I woke up at 9:30am thinking it had to be 2pm in the afternoon, the electric must have gone off in the middle of the night and that is why the clock was reading incorrectly. The electric going out is not uncommon where I have been staying. It felt like I had not slept enough, so I laid in bed for another forty five minutes and then suddenly felt very rested, like unusually rested... It was really 10:15am and I went through the day functioning like I had eight hours of sleep like never before in my entire life! Mo and I went out to create some music and then took a hike along a mountain ridge in the dark and realized the moon was full. I'm just going with the flow, full moon style. I'm working towards sending out emails to people I've been in contact with from the past asking for contribution. I'm going to ask everyone no matter what the age, relation or past history and not get in the way of what I think is appropriate for other people. I know some friends will be shocked that I have the nerve to ask them. Ha, they have built a barrier within the friendship that has worked well over the years. Friends who's kids are also friends of mine, if the kids are old enough to be online and old enough to have five bucks of their own to go into a store and purchase a candy bar... then they are old enough to have an opportunity to give a few bucks for something they think is worthwhile. If a husband contributes and the wife is also a friend I'm going to ask both anyway unless a contribution is stated that it is for both parities. Family.. well there are only a few left in my life and they will probably be most appalled that I would ask for support but I'm going to do it anyway. I do it as from the mindset of opportunity on every angle. This is a good opportunity for everyone, especially for me. My formative years were spent being accused of being an opportunist as though it was a bad thing. I now know... it is about the intent behind opportunity that matters and thank God I have learned to know and trust my pure intent and not let others use it for their own rationalizations, agendas, false motives and inability to ask for support themselves.
October 17, 2013
It rained today. Mo is a very funny dog. You would be amazed at how simple and domesticated he is yet pure dog. He sits in the chair just as in the picture I posted. His look is of total boredom with complete resignation that he will need to wait for me to do something so he can too. My dog fascinates me. I'm going to have about five more days of writing my thoughts on asking people for money. I've spent a large part of my life learning how I was too needy in the past and how the problem came from within. Now, it is not so much a question of my asking too much... or inappropriately... it is who am I asking... I do not want to waste my time with people who are takers and not givers and who do not care in ways that interest me in life. I have made all my decisions with full clarity, with full responsibility from the very start. I just need to remember that. I am reminded of when I sold my home when asking for moeny. Then also, in order for me to let go of everything I owned I had to find a way in my brain to do it. So I'm trying to find a way once again. Back then... value and respect. I was not going to sell my $4000 persian rug for $50. No one would contribute a decent amount of money for it so I gave it away to someone who would value and respect it a lot more than $50 bucks worth. Thats what ended up happening with 80% of what I owned. I gave it away. So be it. This was the only way I could do it. I go back and forth past the point where rejection hurts or makes me angry in asking for contribution. Some people's rejections are so ridiculous. I now have comedy material to sell if I need to. Its true... I'm so thankful I can laugh with this process sometimes. (actually I go back and forth) I do enjoy it on some level even though nothing can be more difficult. It just got so stupid so many times dealing with people... the transparency of what holding onto five dollars represents or how it is not possible for people to let go is totally understandable... not rational. But of course its not really about the money... There has been a method to my madness so to speak. While experimenting and hoping everything will work out and I can contiune with the Traveling Piano. I know it will in one way or another because I will learn something. Maybe, what an idiot I am for trying. Naa... not really, I've been doing pretty good with my life and its not from being an idiot.
October 16, 2013
I called the Shenandoah Virginia National Park tourist bureau as I'd like to see some fall color and create music in it as I did last year on Skyline Drive. The national park road is closed and I asked what kind of barricade was there because I'm ready to create some civil disobedience with the government shutdown that is happening, restricting my being able to traverse onto "my government"? ...land to enjoy nature. It's awful, no free country here, thats for sure! The lady said seeing as there was four days of rain a lot of the trees have already lost their leaves. I'm just going to take it all one day at a time. Today, I drove to the nearby lake where I often go. The temperature was about seventy degrees, oh so nice and the fall color, I don't think it has peaked yet.
October 15, 2013
It felt good to get out today. We drove to the park and met two women with a little girl. They were Jehovah Witness and I had some interesting journey stories about their faith to share with them. While constantly thinking about how I want to proceed in order to continue with the journey and asking for contribution from my email list or not... I'm trying to grasp if that will take away from the magic of when I originally met the people which was an all giving situation. People do not contribute unless asked. Should I avoid the positive people in order to please the negative people by staying away from asking which would stir up their crap? How do I know who's in what boat so to speak? Also, people are in different situations at different times in their life. Should I assume its a negative time for everyone in order to play it safe? Is it better to just end the journey because some people will get mad? The fact is I know nothing. Whatever other people think is none of my business for now. If there is one thing I have learned in this process, it is that the reasoning and rational for giving or not giving has thousands and thousands of different variations depending on personalities, upbringing and present situations in life. My job is to reach out. Its all about practice, learning how to relate and grow up through relationship with other people for better or worse.
I'll look at it like a job, ugh. Work objectively, not take anything personally. Think of it in terms of fun, a numbers game, explore, experiment. Just like work in the old days of cold calling for performance, the only difference is back then it was all about "me" the "money" getting the "job" for the fun I would have and the accomplishment. The idea now is to create personal interactions. I don't want to destroy friendships from asking for a favor. If that happens really, do I want friendships that get ruined with a request for help? I don't want to take other people's personal rejections personally. I must be willing to fail, lose friends, take chances and make mistakes in order to accomplish, succeed and contribute to life with other people in positive relationship. There are a lot of easier ways to collect money. Ha, my way is this personal one on one way for now. So, who am I going to please? There will be people who appreciate my thinking of them with a request for contribution. There will be those who will appreciate the opportunity to support, be part of and those who will enjoy feeling wanted and needed. There will be those wanting to express desire and show appreciation, gratitude, create an act of kindness. These are the kind of people I want to connect with, am looking for, why I decided to choose this route of looking for contribution. Even though it might be one in a thousand... I'll go through as many thousands as it takes to fill me up or... I just can't go on any longer.
October 14, 2013
The rain seems to have stopped but it is cloudy outside. I finished updating this blog today. The posts for this website stopped over a month ago. There has never before been more than a week gone by since the journey began... that I did not post. It has been over a month! I just could not go through the process that happened in working to get contribution and also take the truck out, create music, process pictures, live life's necessities... all the while feeling emotionally drained from dealing with people and contribution. For some reason, I do not know why, it was very important for me to document what I went through in detail. To keep my thoughts straight and my motives on track and to be as honest as possible... well, to write it all down was probably the most difficult thing I have done in this journey to date. You would not believe how much time I put into everything. I almost can't believe it myself. Anyway, its over. Thank God. I'm done with it. Hope I can move on in better ways. As I found pictures to post it is amazing how it feels like I have been doing nothing as far as the Traveling Piano journey with the truck... but really, I did allot in spite of my personal drama. Through the whole last month, I still took the Traveling Piano out to share and I think I was more conscious of enjoying nature more then ever before, I forgot that I treated myself to a music concert in Fairfax, Virginia. I've been to a concert no more than five times in the last ten years. Back on September 29th I heard a group called Atoms for Peace with the band Radio Head's Thom Yorke, the Red Hot Chili Pepper's bass player Flea and a bunch of other guys. I had no idea what to expect so I went early and it was in a small university stadium setting with parking close outside. I parked in a rear corner of the lot and created music before the concert for about an hour. Some of the people arriving for the concert found Mo and I... we had a time of it.
October 13, 2013
Day four of rain. The older I get the more I realize that the best of all possible worlds... exists in music. Music can heal any wounds the world can have. My friend Corey sent me a hammock he made by hand earlier this year. I reminded him of how I think about his contribution to my life and journey almost every day. He replied, "Aw Danny... you know I put loving intent in every stitch, as you taught me... it's all about intent. You told me that if you are clear on your intent, you are solid. Glad you feel it, as I really do respect you and how you live your life. Reminds me of this quote: "They were afraid of your authentic love. Because the authentic love is beyond your control. You are possessed by it. You are not the possessor. You are the possessed. And every society wants you to be in control. The society is afraid of your wild nature. It is afraid of your naturalness. So from the very beginning it starts spreading your wings. And the most basic thing that is dangerous in you... is the possibility of love. Because if you are possessed by love you can go even against the whole world." -Osho
October 12, 2013
Day three of rain. I'm considering whether I want to go through my email list to start asking for contribution in order to continue. Having gone through my facebook friends and how torturous it was... well, it had to be done that I know. Why? Maybe I'm looking for attachment, commitment for myself from outside of myself to keep going. So the present situation is this. The general consensus is that the Traveling Piano truck is just worn out. It has been repaired enough to get back to where I have been staying to tie up loose ends. (hopefully) The truck is on its way out. It is worn out. How long will it last, there is no time table. It could be weeks, it could be months, could be days. The engine has been resealed but the compression is weak and so is the transmission, the rear differential, etc... it is all just shutting down so... as I drive, it will just get slower and slower until it just stops. I am on borrowed time with the Traveling Piano truck and am making the most of it. There must be a solution, ha... what? The Traveling Piano is much more than simply a truck that can be replaced. It has been my life 100%... work, play, music, my relationships for the last 28 years. It is not possible to replace, that would take the creation of a custom made vehicle involving more resources than I have. To create a professional fundraising campaign would be full time twelve hour a day work in of itself. I realize that people rebuild their classic vehicles to create value and only use for short distances on road. This is a unique situation, a unique value and might need to be rebuilt for heavy duty use. The parts are now rare and need to be researched in oder to find, also custom made parts may be necessary.
Constantly, I clarify what makes the Traveling Piano unique for people. Have you ever found yourself drawn towards something, into a situation with a person who you do not know for just a short period of time where you connect with them and as a result are given something tangible in a mental, physical and spiritual way, simply as a gift? Your ability to trust yourself in the situation with a sense of knowing the gift is unconditional, amazes you. All that exists... your simply being yourself in relationship with the experience. That is simply one Traveling Piano perspective. Asking for, or looking for, or showing opportunity for money contribution... destroys the magic. The purity of one on one human relational sharing gets diluted when money enters the equation. Having been through it over 50,000 times I can say that with complete clarity. This is what I want to keep, the pure experience of giving... and that why I am now asking for others to share with me so I can continue sharing with others.There are many places to look to and ways to get money. First I'm looking to friends. It is an opportunity to learn about friends I don't know very well for better or worse.
October 11, 2013
Its the second day of rain. I've been enjoying it. Concerning contribution... I have found and have said many times that most people only give out of need. Now I realize that many people do not have the tools in their heads to give even if they want to. Some don't want tools because it is easier for them just to pass the work onto others. Then there are those who need to be guilted into giving, forced or shamed with obligation, expectation... I just want for everyone to participate, be with me in life along with my experiences and without conditions. That is what I enjoy most. Never have I wanted for people to pay money to do that... and they never have. Financial contributions have made up for about five percent of the journeys costs to date. Some people have contributed to the journey by inviting me into their homes. Mostly, I have always considered the action of people trusting me enough to get into the Traveling Piano truck to try out some music on the piano for themselves, their act of having fun with me... that has been the biggest contribution what I really want or need. When people trust me enough to join in and be part of the Traveling Piano experience, I have always considered that a contribution to my life in the exact same way friends have done so financially over the last month.
Need to rant because I wanted to go to Shenandoah Valley this week and this has been a major Traveling Piano peeve through the years in general. It has to do with fee's to enjoy nature. The republicans governing this country are exposing how we do not live in the "Land of the Free." This is a fact. For the sake of business control and manipulation... now, my rights to stand freely, or park the Traveling Piano truck on urban city streets is now illegal... deemed suspicious using fear to create laws of control. Our public lands and rights as human beings to enjoy nature increasingly again, under the guise of protection, money and jobs for people... have become government business. I am being restricted from enjoying the human right to be in nature now deemed national parks. A government shutdown for self-agenda mostly for the sake of hate, this power play is not for the good of us all... and it is illegal. Do they care? Money talks. The politicians are creating more untrustworthiness for themselves and for the countries citizens while foolishly showing that to the world. Nobody owns the planet earth! God, this makes me angry.
October 10, 2013
Today is the first rainy day that I can remember. I can also remember saying, "this is the first sunny day that I can remember," and then the opposite, then the opposite, etc... It is awesome that I have found people in my life not professionally, not commercially but in a personal way who value and trust me along with what I offer for the world... and who have contributed to my life to be helpful in the ways that I desire. I'll call that a blessing for whatever its worth. Good friends are powerful for me. They know me and have shown that fact through contribution to help keep the Traveling Piano going. Every time someone contributes... any negativity I have is transformed into their love. Up until my mid-twenties I could find no one to trust. While always searching, a spiritual awakening of sorts happened. It happened "through" people and my desire. Since then I have been seeking understanding in life "through" people, and working to not let go of life by keeping people alive in my life. And then there people I just wanna get rid of! lol... I was talking with my close friend Larry in his eighties. He spends most of his days getting blood transfusions, living with a battery pace maker for his heart wrapped around his waist that he needs to recharge every night. Recently, Larry lost his wife of sixty one years, he has really bad knees, a bad back, has mrsa, cancer... he told me his mother taught him that the secret to longevity is to focus on the little things in life. He wants to clean off the back porch, so he can sit out and enjoy some tea. Thats his long term goal for life. His claim to fame is that he will die with no enemies. That probably won't happen for me but... I will die knowing that I am loved.
A friend recently said, "The body isn't important other than to allow your mind to experience things. If all your doing is worrying about what your body can't do, you deny your mind the pleasure of enjoying the things your body can do. I have this conviction via quantum physics and the notion of our energy as mass forming part of the universal energy once it has used our bodies to exhaustion, feeding itself. It is our spirit, soul, life force, energy, label it how you will, that is important. The body is in my view the vessel that transports our mind around. The body is something that should be cared for as a piece of equipment and maintained to whatever standard we (our mind) sees fit. Its role is transport and data processing. If you will, it is like a two way radio. It receives information. The brain processes that information and shares it. Along the way, a well maintained self and body, will not only process and share information, it will enhance or add to it too. The object of all of this is to feed our souls and those of others with the beauty and vivacity of all that is around us, the more so that when our bodies are exhausted, the most incredible energy can be released into the universe. In Essence we obsess too much about physical health to the detriment of our mental and spiritual well being. A healthy body will serve a healthy mind for longer. But an unhealthy body can still serve a healthy mind. Life is unimportant...LIVING is."
October 09, 2013
October 08, 2013
Feeling a bit weary, I took Mo to the park before sunset and began creating music in a grove of trees with an orange blue pastel sky. An older gent appears and sits down in front of a nearby tree to listen. Before arriving at the park I stopped at the mailbox. There were four letters, all from facebook friends none of whom I've every met in person. The first letter was from an friend in Israel. She had gone to her local bank to exchanged 30 bucks worth if sheqels into dollars for me. Another friend from Newfoundland who has no money to spare sent $30 her sister had given to her as an Easter present earlier in the year. A musician friend sent me four of his music cd's and a check for a $100. A friend in her nineties from Alaska sent me $25 bucks cash... all to support the Traveling Piano's continuation and to get the engine rebuilt. Friends are constantly saying, "its only a little, wish I had more to contribute" and again, and again I am reminded that it is not about the money it is about the tangible act of sharing, the generosity, the trust, more than anything else the caring through time, energy and effort that friends have gone through to show financial support of my life... which is emotionally helping me to move forward.
So back to the park. The music must have been exceptionally emotional. When I finished playing the guy who was sitting came up to the truck for a Traveling Piano experience. He was in his late seventies and said when he heard the music it felt like he was in heaven. He asked if I thought music was the language of the universe. Then my friend Paul appeared with his dog Mollie. He had been searching the park to find out what he was hearing. Paul began to describe his finding us in the park. He was walking and hearing sounds that were unidentifiable. While trying to figure what he was hearing, at first it was not like music... maybe like wind-chimes but the sounds were not high pitched enough. There was a sort of rumble to it. He said part of him was thinking it might be me playing music in the park somewhere but had mixed feelings about that because... he almost did not want to solve the mystery. It was a beautiful, spiritual sort of feeling and experience. Both guys said this. We were talking about how the music is more amazing when people only hear it. They become compelled to search for and find it. When they don't see it happening, it is truly their own experience of spirituality, god, the universe, imagination, whatever. I knew exactly what was being heard. It was my gratitude expressing love.
October 07, 2013
A friend gave me some fresh bluefish and I ate sizzling hot, grilled bluefish... marinated overnight in salt, pepper and mayo for... breakfast, lunch and dinner today! Life did not go as smoothly as I had hoped for last month. When someone says they care about the Traveling Piano, do to so without action means nothing to me personally. To care about something demands action. Every friend who has cared to date with and in my present situation... financial contribution for me has been the action for caring. It is action from and with others that affects my life and adds to it so I can continue adding to others. Now we are doing it together. The day the truck broke down in August... on a subconscious level I now realize I needed desperately the support of people's continued contribution, the action of... to keep going. If not contribution by actually participating with me on the truck in having fun then through money so I could get back to working the "fun" on the truck. A few people have thrown the, "get a job" line at me which as much as I realize is asinine, it still hurts. Giving freely to the world without commercial, political, organizational affiliation is work. Earning the finances in anyway whats so ever in order to give... is work. The goal... is to constantly re-adjust, have faith, stay flexible, accept and find new ways to enjoy the work. Protect the Enthusiasm for Giving. That is what I have been doing. My life from the start went from expectation to being taught obligation which resulted in disappointment and then anger. Now working the journey... its just plain fun! I don't care what happens because I'm having too much fun while trying to stay realistic. (and not stupid) I have been reminded... "Nobody made a greater mistake than he who did nothing because he could only do a little." Please Contribute If a check, cash or money is easier, I'll send you an address. Use the contact link in the menu to the left of this page.
October 06, 2013
Today I went into the center of Berkeley Springs, West Virginia. Its been a while since I had been there. In being able to pace myself with interactions I got to meet lots of interesting people. A woman with a black eye, it was obvious she has troubles in her life, a rocket scientist and his kids, a guy who arrived five days ago to visit from India who is famous for singing ancient Indian music, a friend I have not seen in over a year and just lots of people wanting to have some fun. Going out with the Traveling Piano and interacting with people during this transition period is not easy. Money is always on my mind. It wants to seep into the interactions through hope that people will offer a contribution, like a new Traveling Piano truck or everything needed to get to China and back with the "new" truck. Trying to keep out of the conversations the present situation with the truck engine and ongoing expenses, how it all will end if money does not start flowing in... wow, its all about focus and working to keeping my intent present. A large part of my interaction with people is in putting out the vibe that what they are receiving is unconditional and sometimes (often) reassuring them of that verbally. (all the while negating the desire for financial support at the same time) I can do it!
My writings now are more personal then ever before. They will be for better or worse and for the purpose of understanding. Release comes through journaling. Being as transparent as possible has been a life saver for me. It has shown itself to be a fact for over 30 years. Sharing as much as possible will help someone else and the number of people I help is not important, just one is enough. Helping myself first... as one person leads to one other person. That is the route for me to take in life, one to one, to one, to one, to one. A age fifteen I knew that being the way other people wanted for me to be was not going to happen. God knows I wanted to be like everyone else but I knew that was not in my cards. The struggles surrounding that reality resulted in total fear and a torturous self-loathing. I had no ability to love myself and could not trust love from anyone in my world. I began to seek help. I failed many times until I was filled with what I call "grace." People came into my life who loved me until I was able to love myself. It still happens... it is called the process of my life. My first reaction is to say no and then I see the truth, and then I begin to feel, speak and create for myself. It continues to happen because first, I acknowledge, then feel grateful and next I share the gratitude. My main job in life is to keep reaching out to stay connected with the people in gratitude.
October 05, 2013
I had a unusual... usual experience today. When life happens differently from what has been ingrained in my mind no matter how many times it happens, the feeling is always strange, crazy and exciting. Everyone knows whats going on with the truck and engine, correct? The Traveling Piano needs restoration... like now, the engine can go at any time. Its on my mind all the time. So, last night I'm in the local park. Its dark and I am by a boat dock. I took Mo for a little run and when I came back there was a small vintage Mazda with the engine running and no one around. It had been restored and was looking like a hot little vehicle. A young guy appeared and I asked him if it was his? He said yes and I jokingly asked him if I could have it which started a short conversation. He was there with family and friends because he was getting married in the park tomorrow. As it turns out he lives where I grew up and owned my home in Bucks County, Pennsylvania like twenty minutes away from where I lived. In fact he has seen me through the years in different performance situations back in the old days. His family has vacationed in the park where we were here in West Virginia for fifty years. He just finished school for vehicle restoration body work as a mechanic back in Bucks county. I told him I was looking for someone to help replace the engine. He had to run and get his dog and said he would be back in twenty minutes. Possibilities... waited, he came back but could not find his dogs leash and had to go find someone to get one. They were all having a big barbecue across the way and it was strange that we met where I was parked because everyone was in another area, parked closer to the picnic and he was not there to park. I have no idea why he was there. After about five minutes I figured he was not going to return because well, for obvious reasons. I chalked it up to another close encounter. I've had so many and know better than to try and project expectations from it. It is what it is, one of those things... they happen with no rhyme or reason. It is totally difficult for me not to put expectations on possibilities. As I was leaving the park I had seen that he had come back because his car was gone. He had never parked there. What was he doing there?
It did stay on my mind all night and while driving back into the park today to create music... constant right relating about the encounter was front and center. Letting it be what it was, being conscious to not create illusional possibility about it, letting it go with all the other synchronistic experiences I have had. It was about four in the afternoon. As I entered the park there were a lot of cars driving around. I knew it was people from the wedding and assumed they were all on their way to the lodge for the reception as the wedding probably happened in the late morning. I headed for my spot on the lake where few people ever find. It was strange, for the first time ever there was a large pile of dog poo on the grassy area in front of where I play. Since 2006, coming to the park I never saw something like that and felt like I just had to clean it up. Weird, because I don't pick up after my own dog, why was I searching for something to help clean the area so I could play music? Well, I did it and then jumped onto the piano to play. Before I even got started a couple with their baby boy stopped by and I began to tell them about the strange encounter with the groom the night before. Out of no where the groom arrives with his new wife and two photographers, no one else. That was mind boggling. How synchronistic that we would meet again at such a specific time. They had come to get a few quick pictures by the lake and then get back to the wedding. I asked if he wanted to get onto the Traveling Piano for a few pictures. Ha, I ended up driving the truck onto the grassy area I had just cleaned up. The bride and groom got onto the truck, played some notes, did some smooching, we got some pictures and they were gone. He gave me a hug, kept saying I was a good man and he would find me. Now for me... its back to staying away from the idea of potential. If I look to what happened and project it as the solution, depend on it, hang onto it, not let go of it, try to work it in anyway... I know from experience zero will come from it. The experience was totally interesting, coincidental, serendipitous in a sense of fun and nothing else. Something could manifest from it but my job is to stay out of the way (in my mind) and if it is possible that this guy might be able to help... I must trust calmly that it will happen, let it happen in its own way, in its own time if it is meant to be. Situations like this often simply show me that possibilities exist, not necessarily that they are the possibilities in of themselves.
October 04, 2013
First I played on an mountain ridge overlook today and just now came back from a walk in the most perfect night air. The crickets are dying down but still around, stars fill the sky... It is interesting that a journey so much about keeping the focus off money... it is presently so on-focus about money. Its always on my mind now. Maybe its about the giving, the interactions not being about money, the expectations and obligations concerning some people. I'm learning that for myself... its about letting go of my expectations and obligations or any "getting," and also about creating the best possible perspective concerning money. There's no getting around it for my life. Ugh! I sold my home so I would not have to deal with it. Then I created expectations that I would never have to worry about it ever again. The truth is I don't worry about it. I frustrate the shit out of myself about it! How it comes to me... in what ways... how much... when... asking for it, getting it, working for it etc... Learning how it pertains to survival and fun and in of itself, the relationships it creates... When I was young and relatives would give me money it did not really mean anything. It was a precious mint coin I had no interest in or a check that went into the bank. I got nothing from that or it was cash that I could not hold onto and had to use under supervision or it was to learn with, be wary about in how I use it... most importantly something to save for mostly an emergency. I really enjoyed selling candy bars for school, lemonade from a stand, creating merchandise for my old career... I enjoyed getting gigs for a time and collecting fees for my work but burnt out of all that. Now, where am I going in my life concerning money and this journey? Is my getting more of it needed to survive?
October 03, 2013
Mo and I spent time at a lake today with music and a few people. I am working through a huge transition for this journey so I must continue to write about it until I get it out of my system. The Traveling Piano truck has too much energy invested to just throw away. I am troubled with the idea of helping people to justify a contribution through ways like saying along with all the fun, the truck has delivered comfort to communities after troubling events such as Katrina, Hurricane Sandy, Virginia Tech (at their request), Sandy Hook CT, the Joplin MO tornado, Trenton NJ floods, etc... but for those who may think it is wrong to use a "hook," I feel totally clean about that. The question is do I want to? If I share the Traveling Piano fun, there is nothing wrong with sharing where and why also. There will be those who have had a Traveling Piano experience who will say my asking for contribution now destroys what I created for them in the past. It makes everything about me a lie, that I was without financial agenda and that now, I am putting pressure on them to pay up. I am exposing my true greedy character with agenda. The fact is that people partake if they choose to. People discover the Traveling Piano. Sometimes I invite them into the space if they look interested. We have a short time period together of interacting that is a pure exchange of love for all involved including myself without money or anything else involved. Then they leave and that is that. It has meant allot to me in having no need to invest energy to get something from the experience or figure out if they are deserving. Everyone is treated equally. My ability and the gift comes through grace. No ego is involved and that is why what I do has has been successful. I get to experience and everyone else gets to experience core human spirit only, all the good.
For anyone from the past who gives me trouble now... about in this new life situation, I am glad I did not know about how they think back when I was giving to them. To them I say, you received a gift. It was true and pure. Now that life has moved on, do not destroy the past by attaching it to the present with your mistrust concerning motives. Am I using a past gift? Am I trying to capitalize? A person could look at it that way. After deep, deep thought I am clear that I am asking for support not because I gave to anyone but because I am thinking they know and trust me. My asking is difficult to do. Constantly I must remind myself that it is not a humiliating request... that I have decided to ask those who would be most trustworthy for me to ask first. People who do not know anything about the Traveling Piano... most need to be sold on the idea for contribution. If I am going to put the energy out to sell, I might as well sell myself commercially once again. Thats how I feel about it all. Hopefully, people will give back support so I can continue to support others. I used my own financial security because that was easier than asking for money from others. I was really burnt out of soliciting for fees for twenty years. The idea of working for tips has never interested me because I know that does not work for the quality of life I want to enjoy. When money enters the picture my self respect enters the picture. This is why when I worked with a career, it was a few jobs for large fees verses many jobs for little fees. Right or wrong, that is the way it is. I have worked on this issue my entire life and still, I am working on it. It is what it is. When someone hands me a dollar as a tip for what I give to them with the Traveling Piano that says to me, "Danny, all the unconditional love, expertise, music, time, effort, expense, fun, friendship, respect... its all worth a dollar." When people only have a dollar to give... I don't want it. If thats all they have... they need it more than I do. When people give me a dollar out of friendship, appreciation, support, etc... I accept it graciously but really... does anyone think a dollar is going to make a difference? Its like giving me a nickel. Then the old stale worn out logic of... "if everyone gave a dollar it all adds up" ...let me tell you, I've been doing what I do for my entire life so I know better than just about everyone else on this topic... it adds up to not enough. It is a major challenge to make everything palatable for myself, the letting go of pride and the keeping of value and respect on my terms. I'd rather no money transaction at all for my work if its not going to pay off big-time. So it has been for my entire life. Its been a good life this way. Others would like for me to think differently or as they do. Ain't gonna happen.
October 02, 2013
My thoughts, I want them all written down and shared. I try to not repeat myself and just do the best that I can. Some people almost drove me crazy on facebook because I asked for contribution. When I said if they don't contribute to please do not comment, that to many felt manipulative to them. That was not my intent. Of course it was only the people who did contribute that felt that way. They posted, "I was going to, but now I'm not." Someone asked, "are there circumstances where you are truly happy to accept a friend saying no" ... as though saying "no" was as a gesture of good will especially when I said it would not be helpful... my answer, "No." Someone said they do not think I should ask for money from people or expect it, to get a job. I told them, dealing with friends who say stuff like that... was a job in of itself. I was accused of not being not a happy man... I said, how the hell could I have brought all the joy I have to the world as an unhappy man! There was passive aggressive behavior with setups like, "with a very heavy and heartfelt sadness I must say" or "with love and appreciation to "those" with kind hearts I want to say." (danny, no kind heart) There were comments that hit below the belt like "especially love to Mo sadly absorbing your negative energy." Good friends posted comments to console me and I gave constant reassurance that along with the chaos I was moving forward. I wanted everyone to see that I was continuing daily with the Traveling Piano and with positive posts. If the negativity had been getting to me completely, I would not have been able to stay positive and continue to move through it all. Not until most of the ranting comments and posts were over did I discover a trick that would have avoided a lot of emotional turmoil for myself and other "good" friends. When someone would post something I did not want on my timeline or began to piggy back and bond to gang up on me in anger on other posts thereby creating negative spirals downward on my timeline... I would take the comment and move it to their own timeline in order to discuss. Every single time I did that, they would discontinue discussion. Ha, a great strategy was discovered.
After self examination from what a few friends whom I trust said, I removed the negative posts on facebook because they were so painful for a few people I care about. Also, I was guilty of a little bit of transference onto my page. I wanted other people to know my pain and the ones who were causing it to stop. My intent in posting had to be all for the good and as small as the transference part was, that part was not good... so I removed it all. Then I felt better. I posted: Today I am feeling very respected by friends who have held back from commenting, liking or suggesting on past posts about contribution, and especially on the rants... as I requested. I mean that truly and wholly, thank you if your one of them. Sometimes, "nothing" is better. I know it has been difficult for many, at times. I am also appreciative for my friends who hang in with me in simply "being" as I go through my life's process and know when to give emotional support when needed. They remind me that everyone is simply doing the best that they can.
I gave a tremendous amount of thought to friends I value who attacked me and realized I was not valuing anything functional or good for either of our lives. I dropped them, even blocked them. That was most difficult to do. I told myself, "I did it with family and I can't don't with non-family? There was something wrong with that so I "stepped up to the plate" so to speak. Why should I be afraid to ask friends for contribution to my journey especially when they have expressed appreciation and enjoyment for it. Fear comes from being taught that asking for what I want is an imposition for others. So how does money happen? You ask for a job and accept whatever is offered in exchange for the work. That is what I was taught, no other options. Being an entrepreneur concerning money was not something to be possible in the "inner circle of trust" ...my world growing up. Being gifted may come once in a while from a special occasion but the only way to obtain money is through a conventional job. Don't ever ask for a gift. I was taught that asking for money would create rejection and humiliation and anger. Yep... thats the way it is for some people when you ask them for anything. It also sparks all their own neediness and then all they can see, their own neediness... using me to see it. Then they project that I am also needy and then want to transfer all their frustration, hate, hopelessness, lack of control and everything else I don't want to feel... onto me and into my request and also bond with that. Really, I have learned that people like that, keep me down in life. Thats why the "don't ask" mentality was taught in the first place... to keep people, others in their place, keep them down for convenience, control, manipulation and greediness.
October 01, 2013
So here is what happened at the end of August. The truck engine cracks. I get scared and I am reminded to first breath and then bring out all my mental and spiritual tools to stay calm. Truck gets a temporary repair. My total financial worth has been invested into the journey and is almost used up. What should I do? There are many options. People have always asked... what are you going to do when the money runs out? And I have always said, "I'll do what I have to do. Well... I'm doing it. I'm calling out my cards to ask for contribution. The first thing in that process is to make the decision to stay out of any negativity or false motives other people may try to assign or transfer onto me as a result of the request. Then I look at the opportunities I am presenting in the request, Then I protect and guard my enthusiasm for all it is worth. I decided my first step would be to ask facebook friends for support. To ask for support is the most humbling thing for me to do in life, but I have developed a practice of doing it in many ways throughout life. I'm wrapping my head around the idea of doing it for practice, as an exercise for myself, going out on a limb for trust, and helping other people along the way... my intent is pure and clear. I set up certain boundaries and limits for myself in relation to other people in order to keep a sense of self respect through the process. Protection for my enthusiasm with what I am about and do... paramount. Under no conditions will I allow anyone to circumvent my request with negative replies or use the request for purposes other than for what it is intended. Whether people are conscious of doing it or not, anyone who steps over my boundaries and limits, I will call them on it. If they persist I will call them on it each time stronger until they stop. If anyone cannot or does not want to honor the request for contribution, I ask they be respectful in not commenting, liking, or suggesting... as it is not helpful for me. That is stated clear, direct and respectfully. It was hell. I wrote about it all last month in September's blog.
There is no interested in going back to performing for work and while having thought hundreds of different musical work possibilities over a lifetime... such as fundraising, sponsorship, finding patrons, creating a television show, movies, partnering with organizations, charging fees, teaching, playing venues, creating merchandise to sell like books, music cd's, calendars, create a non-profit, etc... seeing as this journey is of a personal one-on-one nature and most of the magic happens specifically through a nonbusiness agenda without associations and with unconditional giving... I may have to put on my creative hat, unless luck or a miracle comes through to help. Asking friends makes sense to me because many friends have personally been gifted with the Traveling Piano themselves. They know me, trust me, understand the agenda and my work. Other friends have been enjoying all the posts, pictures and music consistently for years. There are a couple thousand friends I don't even know who have been following the journey and we've had little or no contact. This has been an opportunity to discover friends I have never connected with, create new relationships and become closer with established ones. I am staying conscious that money is simply an exchange of energy, it is a catalyst, in this case a "show" of contribution, symbolism, a being part of, something helpful through this time of needed support and assurance more than anything else. I have been clear that the amount of money in of itself is not as important as the "act," the effort to give. I've been saying that over and over.