HIS SPIRIT LIVES ON! ... BONER, THE PIANO DOG ... November 27, 1994 ... February 20, 2010
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November 30, 2010
it is the last day of the month and I wonder what the next month will bring. I guess I should just focus on today but what about planning, goals, commitment, what other people think... expectations, money, relationship, work, legacy, my own progressiveness in mind body and spirit? Ha...ha...ha. I say, what is most important for today is to get in touch with my truth. I want to live that in the present moment and feel good about that, for today... nothing more is necessary. Life for me is no longer about accomplishment alone... it is more about "being." Being in the moment and enjoying whatever I am doing or accomplishing... in that moment. Even if it is just to be picking my nose. If my present truth is to enjoy doing that... so be it. As long as I am really and truly enjoying it, I will pick my nose until I die!!! Although... I have plans.
November 29, 2010
My spirit needs reassurance so I was thinking... gratitude is simply the thought or expression of enjoyment. To feel gratitude is to enjoy. It is simple, how do I allow myself to enjoy... by spending a few moments enjoying without having neediness, anger or frustration involved. I become consciously interested and curious about anything no matter how small... I think about how helpul, useful or wonderful... fake it until I make it... just sit and "be" with "whatever" for "what it is" and then I feel better. I feel gratitude.
November 28, 2010
My back has been out for the first time in many years so the Traveling Piano truck has been out of commission. That and also it was seventeen degrees out this morning. The days have been cold. I don't know what I am going to do about the fact that piano dog Mo cannot handle being outside in the cold. This was not a problem with Boner. I dipped Mo in heavy chemicals today for the second time to clear problems relating to his hair lose. This, after a month of dealing with another option that did not work. I have decided to supervise a major house renovating job where I am staying which means a major load of work! I wonder if it is a distraction to keep me from moving forward with Traveling Piano work.
November 27, 2010
My experience of people is constant. I very much enjoy learning to know peoples life experiences. This week I spent some time with a guy who is as ultra conservative and as prejudiced as a person can be. Like someone lost in religion, he was lost in prejudice. His distain was all he could talk about. It came out in every sentence of conversation. I was thinking, this guy watches too much news television or listens to too much talk radio. It was interesting to me that I did not feel threatened and sort of enjoyed his inability to affect me. A short time before and up the road I spent a time with very liberal people. The guy was very relaxed and also outwardly very pro Darwin. Another friend living close by did some positive affirmation and Recki work for the back trouble I have been having recently. She is a spiritual healer. The other day I spent hours with another friend who had done three years hard time for attempted murder. He cooked dinner for me. I learned all about the underground operations, life style and communities in a prison. A neighbor recently reminded me of how possessive and protective people can be about their guns and ammunition. People treat their guns the same way they do their children. Some men in the area where I am staying are completely possessive of their woman. I have woman friends whom I can only talk to when their men are not around. Four black bears have been marked here in West Virginia in the last few weeks. I saw a picture of one hunted down from about a half hour from where I am staying... it filled the back of a pickup truck and its claws were as big as my thumb. Unfortunately this means no more running off leash with Mo in the woods especially at night.
November 26, 2010
The life experiences I've been having are enormous. They have mostly all been about nature and people with music being the vehicle. A new friend invited Mo and I to dinner. The road where the house was had no addresses on it. I came to a bend that made a turn straight down so steep I was afraid to drive any further. There was a house nearby so I went and knocked on the door to ask what their address was. The neighbors invited me in to use the phone... one thing led to another... my friend having just moved to the area drove up the hill to meet me... I created music for everyone... neighbors met each other for the first time once again with the Traveling Piano... I had a great visit with dinner. It was cold today! The truck made it back up the hill with my constant verbal coaxing. It was the steepest hill to date. Later, I spent some time with more close friends. As I type this blog Mo is laying in my lap after having been a frustrating puppy maniac ball of energy all day. The wind outside is howling constant, like a never ending freight train. I love it.
November 25, 2010
My back is out! This is the first time in maybe twenty years? I'll just deal with it. My friend Melvin invited me to a thanksgiving dinner he made with his daughter Holly and son Matthew along with close friend Hugh. Melvin and the kids jumped on the truck for a few moments while rain drops fell. This morning I called some friends. I had to consider time zones. Was it too early for the west coast, how about the midwest... I stayed safe and talked with east coast friends. Can we talk gratitude? This journey has created friends for me from all across the world, no exaggeration!
November 24, 2010
Berkeley Springs, West Virginia
My God, my nerves are fragile! Ok, I'll say it because a friend told me to. "My nerves are fragile... I love myself." Hahaha... whatever. Mo has been picking up on my energy and that is not helping. As far as any antics created I am clear he is just dealing with instincts, he is as good and behaved as he possibly can be. I ended up today in the center of town and the day was all simply a validation of fun, friendship and respect along with synchronicity and spontaneity... relationship etc... all good stuff.
November 23, 2010
November 22, 2010
I was planning to create a full Traveling Piano day, travel somewhere new... The temperature was in the sixties but... I ended up talking to a friend for over five hours so... Mo and I ended up at the local lake. We started out with Mo playing frisbee for the first time and then I improvised music for a full hour! We were about to leave and this guy Ted with his dog Crosby finds us. Talk about a fun guy and the dogs... rolled in duck poop, dug a deep hole together, laid, rolled, ran... Mo was in heaven, me too! Favorite playmates for Mo... dogs, then kids, then people.
November 21, 2010
I know what is going on... I have once again trapped myself into a decisions/choices mode. It is a trap. What happens is that everything just slows down and down... I need to "just do it" whatever, anything... eating and watching movies is not anything although... its ok. I have been walking everyday but that is because Mo needs his exercise. The weather was nice and that got me off my butt. Also, Mo needs to get onto the piano as much as possible. He's still new at this and after several days off he already forgot about jumping in. An older couple found us at a lake. We talked, played some music, took pictures... it was clearly another Traveling Piano... I was meant to be in this couples life today and they... in mine for a short period of musical fun, friendship and respect.
November 20, 2010
Wow! A West Virginia full moon is something to experience! Any full moon... anything nature... life has been moving veeerrry slow...
November 19, 2010
I have been allowing myself an infatuation period with new Piano Dog Mo. The only problem is I worry it won't end... just a little bit. I've been taking it easy watching movies and just "being" with him.
November 18, 2010
A day full of running around doing errands. First to the vet, Mo still has skin issues. I need to bath him in a solution and leave him wet to dry naturally. Thats going to be a killer as I am very allergic to wet dog and it is too cold for him to be wet outside. Establishing residency, renewing my drivers license all that crap... so I can get back out on the road... now up to ten certified pieces of information needed. Try to drive in or live in this country without proving you rent or own property in these times after fifty five years of no problems, rented and having had owned a house and paid it off... not easy. Comment of the day by some lady, "I know it is getting difficult with rules and regulations in the country but I think they should be checking on the people in New York more... don't you?" I looked at her with a blank expression on my face and said, "no, I don't."
November 17, 2010
Piano Dog Mo went for his first swim today... we were in the woods and he was running full speed. He took a full bodied leap into a deep pond completely camouflaged with fallen leaves. It was very funny, he learned how to swim real fast, got out on the wrong side and took a second swim to get back! What does this have to do with the journey or music? Nothing that I can think of. :) I have been completely enjoying this new miracle for my life... fun, friendship and respect with my new buddy Mo!
November 16, 2010
It is raining. I am into letting go of all should, hafta, oughta, need to, better do ideas, thoughts and feelings.
November 15, 2010
Been takin' care of business and doing nothin'.
November 14, 2010
A very, very special treat came my way today. Three years ago the Traveling Piano landed in Newfoundland. I met and stayed with strangers in Windsor Grand Falls, a town of about fifteen thousand people smack dab in the middle of the island. Evelina and Derrick and their family are now... well, I am now very close to them. Last year they happen to be in New York and I happened to be in Pennsylvania. We each drove a couple hours to meet and see each other. It was huge chunk of synchronicity to have been able to run into each other and visit again. Two days ago they flew into Richmond, Virginia and I happen to be a few hours away here in West Virginia. They came and stayed the night with overnight. Derrick helped fix the wood burning stove, we had some pizza, there was a lot of bible talk, I played some music for them... this was the best in friendship for sure. I have total gratitude for these for these friends of mine and the synchronicity that once again brought us together!
November 13, 2010
Reverend Dave, the bus driver I met earlier in the week called and invited us to his family apple butter making hangout. This was lots of fun, a real family affair in a completely different Berkeley Spring area than I had ever visited before. The land was totally cultivated with lawns and houses and beautiful scenery for miles and miles in every direction. The cooking began at five in the morning. Everyone shared the churning of a huge apple pot all day long... constant churning. Everyone takes turns and also brings food to the gathering. Everyone takes home a years supply of apple butter. I felt completely comfortable and Mo entertained the kids and they entertained Mo for hours. I visually experienced the event through the creation of music. One of the guys there was a terrific piano player, teacher and jingle creator from Baltimore, Maryland. He made up and sang Mo songs. The kids climbed all over the piano to play, the adults... I wish I had gone earlier to have had more time!
November 12, 2010
What did I do today I forget! There was some old furniture that I burned in the yard... met up with friends later in the day... was on the internet some... other than that I think I must have zoned out... it happens.
November 11, 2010
Today, I give all to Piano Dog, Mo. He jumped for the first time both into the Traveling Piano truck bed and onto the top of the piano... completely on his own... several times. I did not train him, ask him or show him how to do it. He is less than nine months old and I have had stewardship of him for less than two months. What a champ!
November 10, 2010
Cross Junction, Virginia
The weather has been great! It has been difficult to get it together and clean the truck. I did clean the cab and truck bed today. Keeping my work space clean really feels good. Still... I have not been able to wax the truck since it was painted the day Bo died. That was in February and it has been on my mind almost daily. I have no idea what that is about... some day I'll do it. Ha. We took a drive to Cross Junction, Virginia. A neighbor in the sub-division where I am staying, Pam... has grand kids that she takes care of who live nearby. Ally a fourteen year old with an interest in mathematics and Austin who wants to be a television star and is into wrestling mania. They are really terrific kids. I gave them a Traveling Piano lesson which is about musical simplicity and focus. Pam, Mo, me, the kids, their dog, crowing roosters, a bunch of goats... I played music with it all while Austin did somersaults on the nearby trampoline. After that they both sat with me on the piano. Mo... he was going crazy with all the animals and smells. He stayed on the piano by himself as I drove up and onto the lawn. People say Mo has big shoes to fill from Piano Dog Boner. He's been filling them... Big like.
November 09, 2010
In the Woods, West Virginia
This was one of those crazier Traveling Piano days! I found myself at a self proclaimed redneck wedding in the woods. After driving up a hill that was so steep, I was not sure of the truck would make it... I found grandpa's house with family and friends. Mike on leave from the Navy... presently stationed in Japan married Heather my current neighbor Cindy's daughter. I think the Traveling helped release some tension on arrival and we all had a great time. Mo was wonderfully cooperative. He now jumps up onto the top of the piano having never been coaxed or trained... on his own. He has his job down really good. The minister who I hope to connect with again, is a local school bus driver. The first dance was with a Boogie Woogie on the back of the truck. During the fun the truck began to roll backwards down the hill. My emergency break does not work very well. We got some family pictures and one special shot of the bride and groom with parents and Mo... and guns, on the back of the Traveling Piano! Hahahahahaaaaaa.... There was a second special dance with my improvisational music where I concentrated on creating love, fun, friendship and respect in the present moment... through music, while the newlyweds swayed all "lovey dovey like" on the ground in the autumn leaves.
November 08, 2010
At the Post Office, West Virginia
It has been said that "all things pass." Yep, they do this has been my experience. Feeling crazy this morning I sat on the recliner to breath easy. Nothing was going to get done while my mind was chaotic. I'm doing a body cleanse so I am in food withdrawal! If I don't have my health I don't have the journey. I need more energy and clarity of mind. Cheese, pizza crust, candy bars and grease... I've been out of control. Lost my wallet... frantic search. I took a break in the recliner to clear my head and settle down. Frantic search for a second time... recliner repeat. Frantic search... third time on the recliner... "third time's the charm." I found the wallet. The wallet was under my ass in the recliner. Drove to Berkeley Springs to deal with voter registration to prove an address to register the Traveling Piano truck. This area will be a home base. Drove to the post office to deal with sending back my Pennsylvania Ez-Pass thingamajig. Last time I tried to use it, it didn't work. (this is I'm sure how they make their money) ...forty bucks out of pocket from a ticket that was wrong. I don't have the where-with-all to deal with it.
Ok, the ranting is over. It was warm today! I was feeling guilty about passing the opportunity to create music. I've been so in my head. In the post office parking lot an older guy named Gary approaches the Traveling Piano with interest. Then a young guy named Dan appears. Eventually his girl Brianna comes over. A guy drives by, "man, I really appreciate what you do, thanks." Another older gent, very strongly opinionated (he was fun as a result) a musical composer, piano man happens by. "Structure is the only way to create music," he says. On and on... about ten people total before we left... all in all we hung out with my favorite scenario... strangers meeting for the first time and befriending each other with the Traveling Piano as the vehicle. All very different people bonding over music and friendship for three hours, hanging out in the parking lot of the post office. The city mayor pulled in and parked next to the truck. I missed her because I was on a grassy area across the parking lot with Mo. He had found a friend to play with. Half of the people left without saying goodbye the other half we all have each others phone numbers and tentative plans to get together again. I kept thinking throughout the three hours, "I got a lot of things I need to do today." When the Traveling Piano is in operation and with the daily blog... very little else will get done in a day. So be it! Living the journey as I did today... its a priority. Its fun!
November 6, 2010
When I write not with a positive sense I realize most people run away or at least detach a bit. Maybe I am doing it to push people away. Maybe that is self defeating. The bottom line is that I want to be helpful and honest with my life. When I write stuff like this lately it feels like I am so full of shit! Ha. Its all about blah, blah, blah. Its beginning to feel like I should just shut up! Hahaha... I should be out playing music on the truck... its cold out. Travel... not yet.
November 6, 2010
The new piano for the Traveling Piano truck arrived several days ago and I don't want to deal with it. I should feel excited and happy, right? Disciplining Mo is excruciating. He has regressed a bit and I have him in his cage verses on my lap. The cabin is stinky smelling because of him. I feel full of myself, don't want to talk or write because I don't like what comes out of my mouth or head. It is best to not think... I think. The weather is... hat over the ears and wear my gloves cold. I'm using pictures from last week for the blog.
November 5, 2010
Ahh... this "free" society we live in. It's free as long as the government and every facet of government knows what, where I am, why, how long, my past information, and enough info to track my every move in the future and then they might say, "act free"? I drove an hour to Martinsburg, West Virginia to transfer my truck registration to a new address. I felt "loaded" I had my housing agreement, bank statement with the address on it, social security card, three birth certificates, passport, drivers license, truck registration, proof of insurance, truck title, bill of sale... not good enough!!! Traveled to the Dept of Motor Vehicles, Social Security Building, Voters Registration, Courthouse... not good enough. The birth certificate I have been using for fifty five years... no longer good. I must have a birth certificate issued by the government with an imprinted seal. Were going down people! They are using 911 as the excuse. The social security card I have used for the last fifty five years... now I need both parts of the card. I never even knew there were two parts. They want a w2 form! A voter registration! Truck Insurance, Truck Title, Bill of Sale, House Agreement, Bank Statement, Drivers License Registration, Social Security Card. Were going down people! Cover your asses!!! Less than two months ago I could not leave the country because of this crap. It is getting more difficult to leave the country and now difficult to move around inside of it. Drama? Awarness... awarness... awarness. I will now need to wait weeks to get a new social security card and the other stuff in the mail and then try this process again before the Traveling Piano has a chance to take off.
November 4, 2010
My thoughts really began to spin around after talking with a friend. We were talking about what his enjoyment and purpose for living is... to be of service to God. His life is all about giving himself up to a higher power in order to be of service to the lord. For him it is about sacrifice. I'm with him but in a different way. I see myself in this world as a gift. I must... "be" ...the gift in oder to enjoy and live in the world. There is no struggle for me, myself or I... in this way of thinking. The idea of service for me connotes a "do it wether you like it or not" way of living. Struggling through life is not helpful for me even though God knows... I'm a struggler, a trudger. It is what it is... words, words, words... I prefer the approach of "what can I bring to the world, what do I have... look what I have to offer." I work constantly to cultivate the desire to have confidence in "being" and then as a natural result I end up contributing, being connected and part (of service) which is necessary in order for me to live the way that I want. Thats just me. The approach of "I am God, you are not..." is not helpful. I know that I am not God.
November 3, 2010
It has been raining all day so I have been writing. This is a good thing...
Ack! I must stay honest about this journey... my desire to show the process. The time has come to acquire money wether it be my ownership, someone else's, or a none entities... if I am to continue it feels like I must create the presence of money so that it can exchange hands in some way in order to create a truck that will continue the journey. I purchased a new truck two years ago with the money from the sale of my home. That was a failure. I ended up giving the truck away. Why did I not sell it to get money? It was a complicated matter and the best thing I could have done considering the circumstances. Last night I saw clearly something very important. The idea of getting money in of itself has never been fun for me. The only thing money has ever done for me is validate a sense of self... that I am someone to be respected and desired. When I saw through that illusion well... that is why part of the mission for this journey has been... "no fees or solicitation for tips" (tips are a joke anyway, they do not help financially... tips to this piano man are like pennies...fact.)
I am not going to get any money as long as the process is not fun. I must deal with this. I am very comfortable when it comes to associating money with need. As something fun and in of itself to use and do fun things with... little practice. I was taught to associate money with need. Neediness is not fun. Acquiring money from a needy perspective has proven to be a total flop concerning this journey. The sale of my possessions to raise funding... flop. I wanted to do it with a spirit of fun and respect. A full year of presenting the truck in public with signs on it asking for support... flop. Intensive emailing and flyer distribution... flop. Garnering the interest of Harpo productions to partner up to this point... flop. Mucho newspaper and television media exposure... flop.
The motives put onto me by others as though I am depriving myself, sacrificing, giving of myself to fulfill the worlds needs: "oh, look at that wonderful guy giving everything up to save, show, help the world with his dog, music, piano and truck." ...this kind of thinking is all about "need", too easy to accept. I've been doing this journey for fun. It is not easy to keep the motive straight. I could really play on other people's motives but that would be dishonest, not fun. I constantly asked myself, "why are people not responding with financial support" or more correctly, I was validating myself deep inside, "its not going to happen, there will be no support, you can't have a lot of money, people don't care, you were right all along, people are no damm good (there is truth to that, ha :) ... I do know that all this has its purpose in my learning process for some reason yet to be understood. I now know why the neediness focus has not worked. The idea of money neediness is one hundred percent contradictory to everything this journey is about. Neediness has nothing to do with "fun, friendship and respect." If money is to be included it needs to be included with a feeling of fun, friendship and respect. I need to be clear and honest... no neediness in that mix... half measure will avail nothing!
I am most comfortable with the feeling of neediness because that translates into disappointment which translates into frustration, anger and validation... the not being able to depend on others. I am very comfortable with all that. I have fifty years behind me of comfort with all that. I was originally taught to depend only on my family and church, never on outside human beings or business. Hahahahaha.... Family and Church... Total Black Hole of Neediness! See... there's the feelings come up in me... frustration, anger and need of validation. Also, I have been afraid of money. It has represented authority (major fear) and if I had money I would not be one of or part of "my kind of people" my family, community, friends... Now, why would I want to part of a bunch of losers? ...just joking... Anyway and also, I was never empowered to have money for fun, friendship and respect, never given a sense of having that responsibility. My parents tried to teach me but the responsibility was all about fulfilling present needs and the next life in heaven. I have learned that heaven is right here and now damm it! Ha, thus is true!!! I have a lot of room to grow concerning responsibility... like with money? Now is the time to change. I must keep leaping in faith and through trial and error concerning this issue. I do know that when money has come my way in the past I have been totally responsible with it but still... going after it to get it... the old tapes in my head play with powerfully instilled fear. It is totally easy for me to create self defeating behavior and thoughts. The only solution I have come up with... to work with at this point is to realize that nothing comes from people or man made situations. Everything comes through people and situations. Everything comes, originates from God the universe, a power greater than myself...
November 2, 2010
I took it completely easy today. I felt some illness coming on so I took a nap in the afternoon. This was the second time I can remember doing that, this year. "I'm going to lay down and take a nap for as long as I want!" I'm glad I did it because I needed it. How amazing to have a life where I can dabble in such a luxury. A nap was the best part of my day along with the company of Mo.
November 01, 2010
We drove into Winchester, Virginia to do some errands today... thats about it. :)